Geek: Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I...

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By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 17:55 - United States

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, bitch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 293

You deserved it 56 127

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Same thing different taste

By Laughluv - 02/01/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 813

You deserved it 36 862

By bieberyoulittleSHIT - 31/08/2012 19:20 - United Kingdom - Goole

Today, I was playing some CoD online, when I realised I'd started humming an annoyingly catchy Bieber tune. Before I could come to my senses and pull out my mic, a bunch of my teammates started sarcastically singing along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 604

You deserved it 29 609

By fuck teh poleese - 12/02/2012 21:50 - United States

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 011

You deserved it 29 547

By fuck you, jack - 04/03/2014 20:44 - United States - Peabody

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 267

You deserved it 3 305

By Anonymous - 29/06/2013 14:57 - United States

Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 626

You deserved it 39 827

By TBaggins00 - 21/06/2009 07:34 - United States

Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 252

You deserved it 61 684

By RandomMe - 26/02/2016 08:00 - Cambodia - Sihanouk

Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 697

You deserved it 11 962

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 12:00

Today, I was making one of those microwavable pizza kits. Realizing I had no crushed red pepper to put on it, my mom suggested using a chili pepper she had dried. Thinking it was a great idea, I cracked it open on my pizza and out popped some fuzzy white mold and two maggots. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 688

You deserved it 261

Freakout

By Anonymous - 06/08/2013 06:19 - United States

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand when I shouted, "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 296

You deserved it 9 815

By kumbuck3t15 - 29/07/2012 20:20 - Mexico - Distrito Federal

Today, I decided I need to get a life. I reached this epiphany when I failed to take notice of my friend calling me, until he started calling out my Xbox gamertag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 531

You deserved it 25 910

null_fml 11

Sunday 14 November 2010 0:07

So you're a spawncamper? ...I hate you.

Fichael 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 0:23

don't feel bad I've been throwing stuff at ppl thinking I'm using a tomahawk

Comments

Mirorbo 26

Sunday 14 November 2010 1:04

Honey... I suggest rehab.

idkmyusername 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 2:13

I suggest a haircut. Dontcha think that Afros a bit big?

keefer 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 3:27

rehab doesn't help iv been hooked for 4 years now... my family disowned me I lost my job,my house, and my life... if only I didn't crave it so bad... there is no release!!!!!

manda_baby_rawr 4

Sunday 14 November 2010 4:30

are we still talking about cod...?

Icyyy 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 5:22

Lmao.

SACKERLAND 6

Sunday 14 November 2010 1:13

Gay

Howljerk 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 1:20

How in the HELL is this an FML? This actually got past moderation and posted - sad.

boredonfml 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 1:32

hahaha my friend did the same thing with his chicken a while back when he finished eating and wanted more, though this story relates to the release of halo 3.

Shazbanger 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 1:44

COD ftmfw.

xcrystal011 2

Sunday 14 November 2010 2:00

Call of duty sucks!!! its all about Halo(:

xxKAGExx 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 2:18

reach all day!!!!

Ezuniga 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 3:59

halo weak

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Sunday 14 November 2010 2:00

CoD players are not so much in the minority that people think they are. CoD FTW! ... If it's Infinity Ward, that is.

riseagainst8767x 0

Sunday 14 November 2010 6:25

nah man. treyarch is better than infinity ward. in my opinion at least...

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Sunday 14 November 2010 6:38

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion... but I haven't really liked any of Treyarch's games so far... The Treyarch CoD series isn't the limit either; the early Tony Hawk games even sucked... but in all honesty Black Ops isn't that bad. I just paid 120 dollars for two copies that I can't okay online and that lags when I play the campaign if I touch the AI characters. Yeah.