Love: Today, I realized that I've been a member of eHarmony for almost...

By Anon - 13/06/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I've been a member of eHarmony for almost a year. No one has ever contacted me out of the 134 people I've been "scientifically" matched with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 545

You deserved it 7 314

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Same thing different taste

By z - 05/11/2009 17:20 - United States

Today, I re-joined a popular on-line dating service. I first signed up 3 years ago and was matched with a wonderful woman. After about a year, she broke up with me. I was devastated. After two years of trying to win her back, I decided it's best just to move on. Guess who they matched me with? FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 478

You deserved it 5 454

By Singleforever - 08/08/2016 12:40 - United States - West Hartford

Today, I finally matched with someone on Tinder after using it for a month. I sent a message and they unmatched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 131

You deserved it 1 227

By looking - 25/09/2009 18:16 - United States

Today, I joined a dating website and spent all day filling out and improving my profile. My first match is a guy who relentlessly tried to date me for all 4 years of high school. Now he just has more reasons to tell me how much we're meant to be. We're a 97% match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 397

You deserved it 17 642

By DrakeScott - 02/11/2011 18:14 - United States

Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 994

You deserved it 5 851

By Rajin - 23/03/2009 20:38 - Canada

Today, I signed up for an online dating site. After completing their personality quiz, I set the distance to a 60 mile radius of where I live. Then to the country. Then to the whole world. I got no matches for any of the settings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125 821

You deserved it 16 863

The curse

By Anonymous - 04/05/2020 20:00

Today, at a time when dating app usage is at an all time high, in 3 months I've only managed 4 likes and one brief match on Bumble. I'm not terrible looking by any means, yet I'm weeks away from my 8-year anniversary of being single. Am I cursed or something? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 245

Women be smiling

By Anonymous - 30/04/2023 03:00

Today, it's not enough that men IRL tell me to smile, now the dating apps have OK'd this and decided it's fine to send me email with a stock phrase saying, "[Match's name] wants to see you smile back!" Online dating is the bane of my existence but also my best bet for not being single forever. Curse you, eHarmony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 297

By sad sack. - 18/01/2009 00:40 - United States

Today, I got an email notification from Yahoo! Personals: "Hi, we've found 0 new matches for you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 005

You deserved it 2 903

By Anonymous - 12/06/2009 15:05 - United States

Today, I signed up for an online dating service, a couple of days after my divorce. I got my first batch of matches, and number one was a smiling picture of the woman who had just divorced my ass after 20+ years together. Her profile shows she has to have been active there for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 832

You deserved it 4 375

Trawling

By Adil Ilahi - 05/06/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - Keighley

Today, my friends yet again told me to hop on Tinder and other dating sites, saying how easy it is to match up, and I keep telling them I will soon. In reality, I've been on them for weeks, without a match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 867

You deserved it 316

coopcas 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 12:18

eHarmony is full of bigots, anyhow. Go out more, you're wasting your money. They don't even accept gays, the bastards.

24788 6

Saturday 13 June 2009 12:14

Why don't you try contacting them?

Comments

bazobot 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 6:35

well... have you tried contacting them? i think that's your problem...

FrankieTheNimrod 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 6:56

@redbluegreen- ...that's strange, and still too young. For serious, more than half of the FMLs each day are not appropriate... At all. I mean, even the name of the site and the fact that "**** my life" is at the end of every post.

OPT911 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 7:40

Don't listen to all the people making mean comments about your looks. There's someone for everyone :) EHarmony is not that great, so don't let stuff like that be a referendum on your value as a person or possible partner. Be mad at them charging all that money to your card! That's what you should be upset about. Contact them and tell them. And find a hobby! You'll be all right.

Dickman16 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 8:13

I bet ur fat as H E double hockey sticks

LSeb 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 8:20

It's not you. EHarmony is just big marketing scam. In reality, it is pretty useless as a dating site.

fdyourmom 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 8:26

probably because you have no personality, no sense of humor, and you spend wayyyy too much time on the internet. go meet a person at a park or something.