Miscellaneous: Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was...

By Grandson - 01/01/2012 13:51 - Australia

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 877

You deserved it 2 745

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Same thing different taste

By Michelle - 01/09/2010 08:27 - Netherlands

Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 3 471

By tkoester - 29/08/2015 04:29 - United States - Fairfield

Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 996

You deserved it 1 570

By Anonymous - 31/05/2014 20:04 - United States - Brandon

Today, I spent several hours downtown with my violent grandma, after she was arrested for threatening a guy with a gun. His crime? "Trespassing" by ringing the doorbell and asking if she was interested in donating to charity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 895

You deserved it 3 887

Who are you?

By forgotten - 02/10/2009 07:46 - United Kingdom

Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 511

You deserved it 2 849

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 215

You deserved it 8 144

By badgrandchild - 16/03/2009 21:01 - United States

Today, my phone rang while I was home alone. When I picked up, all I could hear was heavy breathing. Convinced it was one of my friends playing a joke, I said loudly, "Get off the phone, you fucker, and don't call back!" It turned out it was my grandma. She had been having a stroke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 616

You deserved it 92 131

Framed

By Anonymous - 28/09/2019 04:00

Today, the police turned up. It turns out the girl I slept with two nights ago was burgled. She told my great aunt, who happens to live next door to her. They then told my grandparents, who then told my mum. I'm now a suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 176

By newniece - 27/01/2010 00:09 - United States

Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 988

You deserved it 2 562

By Paul - 08/08/2011 01:49 - United States

Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 437

You deserved it 2 927

By Anonymous - 01/08/2015 03:39 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 502

You deserved it 1 924

jemmers 13

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:03

Go grandma! At least she had fun.

kjcamaro3 5

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:03

Come on granny....roll those hooters back up!

Comments

Robbogas 2

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:54

You Aussies sound great fun lol

perdix 29

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:55

For all that is good and holy, I hope this case goes to trial. The Victim Impact Statement will surely cause mass vomiting.

aka_Specs 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:58

Just imagine...if there are pictures to go with it...it may causing some sort of traumatic event in your life.

erfia 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:01

Go grandma!

sharakay79 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:01

Ugh, I just threw up a little. In my mouth. Granny may know how to party, but eew! I'm traumatized by the mental image.

Enslaved 36

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:13

Did you bail her out or leave her in jail to rot to teach her a lesson?

urrealitysux 2

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:20

Is she hot

Kk_Waylen24 21

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:31

That would be disturbing to see *__*

RebekahBrooke 9

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:38

Images... in... my mind... gaaahhh.

silentbutfunny 0

Monday 2 January 2012 2:32

Someday, youll be at that age, and youll be naked, and when people think of that thought, theyll go "Gaaaahhhhh"

kimmi41509 10

Sunday 1 January 2012 20:45

Granny ****

THE_A_TEEN 27

Sunday 1 January 2012 21:31

The thought of hardcore granny **** caused a nuclear holocaust in my brain......

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The Top

Today, my daughter found a hair baked into the crust of her pizza. Grossed out, she put it down the garbage disposal, but I told her to dig it out so we could get a refund. After dinner, she came looking for the saved pizza crust. I was baffled about where it was until I realized I'd eaten it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 4 693

Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 132

The Top

Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 595

You deserved it 3 297

Today, my boyfriend suggested we imagine each other as someone else when we had sex. I imagined he was Tom Cruise. He imagined I was my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 926

You deserved it 8 857

Today, I spent 15 minutes trying to get my cat out of our seven-foot Christmas tree. Once he was done, he tore about the house and broke the nativity scene, beheading baby Jesus and a wise man in the process. The tree is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 537

You deserved it 879

Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to get his point across, one of my students pulled out a gun and put it on the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 123

Today, I showed my fiancé the darling Tinkerbell hoodie I'd bought myself during the weekend. Instead of liking it as I'd hoped, he told me my childish wardrobe was embarrassing, and he wasn't going to be seen in public with me until I wore something different. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 989

You deserved it 51 981

Today, I parked in a disabled bay so I could drop my son off at his appointment. My son uses crutches and has a blue badge. As I was trying to leave, an absolute Karen started chewing my ass for using a disabled bay while “not looking disabled”, then lay under my wheels to stop me leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 83

Same thing different taste

Who are you?

Framed

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