By Anonymous - 31/05/2013 04:28 - United States

Today, I signed a two-year lease on a house. My next-door neighbor said she's in love with me, threatened my girlfriend, and won't stop blasting Taylor Swift. FML
I agree, your life sucks 54 488
You deserved it 4 022
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Top comments

UsernameAnxiety 14

Taylor Swift... Sounds like a living, lucid nightmare. I feel for you.

202 24
rg350dx 29

I thought it wasn't THAT terrible until I read won't stop blasting Taylor swift. My deepest condolences.

185 19

Comments

Second_to_All 11

Retaliate! Crank up the metal. See how many times she can stand listening to Master of Puppets in a row.

28 2
cosmosis 12

As awesome as Master of the Puppets is, change it up with some Alestorm. Pirate Metal is sure to piss anyone off eventually! Arrrrrrrghhh;)

9 2
Enslaved 36

Gotta go harder! Even Taylor Swift fans enjoy Metallica.

1 3
Llama_Face89 33

**** it of you're gonna go that direction go all out and throw on some Bloodbath or Dimmu Borgir.

7 1
Llama_Face89 33

After listening to Ominous Bloodvomit several times in a row chances are she'll be the one moving.

4 0
MermaidAnnariea 10

DIMMU. SO MUCH WIN. OP, then there's also things like alestorm, amon amarth, arkona, carach angren. play some korpiklaani too. then switch it up with ear-splitting opera, and play the tuba BADLY. hahaha

4 1
perdix 29

It's good to have options.

17 5
DocBastard 38

Leases can be broken. So can stereos and legs. Just saying.

80 1
auctiongirl 10

Yes, a lease can indeed be broken but not without some cost .

1 1
GRgoldfish 19

I usually have something witty or smartass thing to say, but all can say is that maybe (if you can) just sit down with her and tell her that you're in a committed relationship, and you don't see her like that. best of luck op.

7 4
perdix 29

#15, when I don't have anything to say, there's always "Aw, I'll be your friend."

6 1
FarFromHome_fml 17

Worst thing to say if she genuinely has an obsession! Trust me, I've known people to take that as an invitation to keep trying to get the girlfriend out of the way

0 0
Dave_Davington 33

Blast "One More Minute" by Weird Al right back at her. That should get the point across.

8 1
RadeonDerp 24

And if she still doesn't get the message, "You're pitiful" is the answer!

5 1
CrissyyyS2 22

Sounds like another failed horror movie plot. Your neighbor would be spying on you and your gf. She murders your gf so there's no competition. Then she tries to hook up with you. She's going to fail... Then decides no one else can have you so she wants to murder you too. Theme song: Scary version of Taylor Swift - You Belong With Me?

11 0
TheWorldGreatest 8

I would have a serious talk with your stalker! Before things get out of hand!

1 4
avapaige1234 19

Is she playing "You Belong With Me?"

7 1
RedPillSucks 31

You tell yourself you're not my kind But you don't even know your mine (Yeah, I changed the last line from mind to mine)

1 5
ManInTheMachine 19

Just start blasting I Knew You Were Trouble in retaliation. Actually, on second thought, sabotaging her stereo or whatever she's using is a better idea.

3 0
GrinchFu1 27

I'm gonna call bullshit on this one. See, I don't think this is real as much as I think this is some sort of test to see how well your sitcom script will be taken by the bigwigs at CBS, NBC, ABC, and FOX. Pitch the script, bro. You got a winner with this one. Hahahahaha!!!

1 0
ManInTheMachine 19

Read the commenting policy. Unless you recognize it as repost, don't bother complaining about how "fake" it seems.

0 0