you do know people get married and break up right? also i know somebody raising a kid with their ex and doing better then a married couple i know who husband didnt want a second child. so getting a ring doesnt mean the kids will have a better life.

Even after marriage, some people aren't ready for children. My parents are the perfect example. Don't generalize all married couples as perfectly ready and capable for kids; I've known unmarried couples who are basically models for the perfect family.

Broken families can happen even when people wait until they are married to have kids. Also, who says a single mother cannot support her child? Or a single father?

BeccaHugs - I must respectfully disagree with pretty much everything you said. Not every married couple works out, and I know a LOT of single parents who so very well. Your generalisation doesn't work at all.

So are you saying it is ok to get knocked up regardless if your bf is willing to commit or not? A child has a better upbringing when both parents are under the same roof and involved in their lives. It is a fact.

My parents got married before they had me. They believed heavily in the sanctity of marriage and in traditional values. That's why my mother refused to leave when my dad started beating her, and I had no choice but to watch. They didn't divorce when my dad was openly having sex with another woman, and even I (as a 9-year-old) knew about it. There were fights and arguments every day, over the most trivial things. I never saw any evidence of romance between my parents, and every time my mom wanted to get romantic, my dad would get extremely annoyed. They stayed married for 25 years because they considered marriage an unbreakable bond, and thought it created the best environment for me. They're divorced now, and all three of us are much happier because of it.

Because marriage never leads to broken families, right?

I'm sorry, but marriage doesn't automatically mean committment. I get that it means both partners were ready at the time, but the divorce rate is crazy high. So no, marriage doesn't mean that he (or she, let's not be gender bias here) is ready for the long haul. I mean ultimately marriage is an idea and a piece of paper that declares that you're married. The whole "sanctity of marriage" is kind of a load. It should be the sanctity of the relationship if anything, because you shouldn't suddenly change your values and principles regarding your significant other because you tied the knot. They should be there prior *to* your marriage... And with that thought in mind, does a relationship becomes less valued because the couple is not married but have been together for 10+ years? Some couples don't particularly want to get married - does that mean they shouldn't want/have children? I'm engaged, and I'll be honest... I've thought about dispensing with the whole marriage. Not because I don't love my fiance but simply because we don't need a piece of paper to show our committment to each other. That's my opinion, anyways.

50- you are almost right. A child has a better upbringing when both parents are HAPPILY under the same roof an are involved in their lives.

Um, I know A lot of divorced people with kids. Marriage does not guarantee a non-broken family.

Just because the father isn't there (for example) doesn't mean it's automatically a broken family. I am a single mother and I'm happy. I'm successful, my son is 100% happy too and healthy. He has a huge support system as well as my myself, and it's damn sure better than a deadbeat dad. Sometimes shit happens, but when it does, you make the best of it and deal with it. Yes, it can be a negative thing on children however in some cases (or more) it's more positive that way. The only thing forever in life is change.

It's just that he's not ready for kids now or at all.

We've agreed we will one day, but when it's been planned and we're both ready.