Miscellaneous: Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with...

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By facepalmshroomer - 07/02/2009 23:24 - United States

Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 643

You deserved it 85 359

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Same thing different taste

By swedishdude - 14/11/2009 13:37 - Sweden

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 021

You deserved it 36 924

Far out

By mary b. - 15/08/2022 14:00

Today, I got a call from my son’s teacher, saying that he raised his hand during a test to say he "couldn't focus, because the ‘metroids’ are harassing me.” Apparently, he forgot about the test and took a healthy dose of shrooms right before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 879

You deserved it 244

By whatjusthappened - 20/12/2013 08:45 - United States - Federal Way

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 175

You deserved it 4 935

By ugh annoying - 01/07/2011 07:41 - United States

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 204

You deserved it 3 993

High times

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 10:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 039

You deserved it 1 636

By drugsforthugs - 18/11/2014 17:26 - United States - Sierra Madre

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 300

You deserved it 4 447

By dmsmcd - 17/12/2010 09:48 - United States

Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 045

You deserved it 3 978

Performance anxiety

By Anonymous - 15/06/2022 20:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I had a presentation for my university class. The bus was 5 minutes late, and I ended up getting to class right on time. As I took a seat, my group was asked to present. I panicked and totally bombed my presentation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 553

Nature sucks

By JoanAsIs - 15/10/2023 13:30 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, my friends convinced me to go on a "short" hike. Little did I know, they're actually all avid hikers, whilst I'm more of an "indoor enthusiast." I've now been climbing a never-ending hill for hours, hallucinating about my cozy couch, and praying for a miracle to deliver pizza to the summit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 372

You laugh, you lose

By YOUFUCKINGFUCKSOCK - 03/11/2012 00:23 - United Kingdom - Gloucester

Today, I gave a big presentation at work, hoping to impress my boss and angle for a promotion. I was already nervous, but a co-worker at the back kept making goofy faces, causing me to repeatedly break into laughter. My boss accused me of being high, and suspended me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 507

You deserved it 4 158

feelslikeanoose 0

Monday 9 February 2009 3:27

How could you not know that mushrooms would last that long? And why on earth would you do ANY drug other than marijuana before a presentation?? Come-on people!

I_Hate_Tpyos 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 22:15

obviously you were hallucinating too much to read that he said it was his first time.

Comments

Jackel0228 12

Friday 21 March 2014 20:29

Well.... Welcome to the family. This FML has greatness everywhere. FML, comments and beyond! Awesome OP. SORRY if it didn't go well but props for having an adventure!

cluch3 22

Sunday 27 April 2014 6:46

I clicked dislike after: today I tried hallucenogenic mushrooms

AlexCanada77 13

Thursday 1 May 2014 20:26

I would pay to see that presentation

umerin 32

Friday 20 June 2014 2:30

Good one.

depressed_child 19

Tuesday 24 June 2014 5:32

Do it on a day where you know you have nothing to do, no responsibilities

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 20 March 2015 14:36

Your logic: "I have a presentation in a few hours, that's a perfect opportunity to try mushrooms for the first time." You seriously deserved that one.