Miscellaneous: Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring... - FML

By Cup_of___ - 26/11/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring for a job application. After seeing the cashier, I thought about inquiring if she was single. After accidentally breaking three bottles of liquor, I didn't do either. I left the store, still single and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 939

You deserved it 30 137

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Same thing different taste

Cash me?

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 11:00 - Canada - Lakeville

Today, working in a liquor store, I had to tell a girl I couldn't sell her alcohol since she was severely intoxicated. She told me to "cash me ousside, how bow dat?" then smashed a bottle of wine and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 837

You deserved it 118

Double take

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 02:00

Today, I walked into a job interview, then turned round and walked back out again. The interviewer was a one-night stand that ended very badly months ago, and she remembered me. I could see in her face the interview was pointless, so instead of grovelling I went to the pub to drown my sorrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 537

Office embarrassment

By mog - 07/11/2019 08:00 - United States

Today, the girl who works at the liquor store came to where I work. She recognized me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 431

You deserved it 888

And I oop

By not drunk - 21/07/2020 08:01

Today, I was at a restaurant. I turned around looking for the restroom. I almost walked into the men’s room, then corrected myself and stumbled in the hallway looking for the ladies’. The employees thought I was drunk and kicked me out. I hadn’t had a single drink. I’m just clumsy as shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 500

You deserved it 260

Late night customers are the worst

By viviham - 04/05/2012 12:08 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 879

You deserved it 2 348

Smart move

By Triedtobecool - 06/04/2009 02:22 - Canada

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 974

You deserved it 99 955

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 292

You deserved it 12 381

By Anonymous - 09/12/2014 21:14 - United States - Margate City

Today, as I was leaving home for my mall kiosk job, my dad asked me where I was off to. When I said I was going to work, he tossed an empty beer bottle to the floor, belched, and said "Bah! Get a REAL job!" He's unemployed and living in my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 607

You deserved it 3 151

By Anonymous - 07/09/2012 00:49 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I was refused employment at a liquor store. Their reason? I'm a regular customer and they're afraid I'll drink all their profits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 426

You deserved it 21 389

By bham boy - 20/04/2011 08:10

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 376

You deserved it 33 760

Next

Top comments

besad_fml 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 20:10

Wow. You are stupid. How did you break 3 bottles? YDI

xCrackerx 3

Thursday 26 November 2009 21:10

If you're this clumsy sober, I'd hate to see you when you're drunk.

Comments

Arancaytar 0

Monday 30 November 2009 20:59

Hm, maybe next time try this while sober? :P

lisha88 1

Sunday 19 June 2011 5:23

she made u that nervous? lol

DinoChick 0

Friday 1 July 2011 0:11

drunk by love

stevenmx86 7

Wednesday 7 December 2011 23:02

You're a worthless piece of shit OP..

atills 0

Wednesday 21 December 2011 23:31

You said inquiring twice, you were going to be single anyway..

indicashayde 8

Saturday 20 August 2016 5:09

Seems as though you've hit rock bottom. You can only go up from here.

Keywords

Party Lonely Love Awkward ADHD Cars Transportation Ironic Work Mental health Vacation Grandparents Accident Miscellaneous Annoying Health Covid Kids Cute Shopping Coworkers Animals Dogs Photography Art Videos Intimacy Exhausted Sex Scams

The Top

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long-distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 823

You deserved it 14 278

Today, my daughter got home from her first date, angry at me because I scared her date so much that he left halfway through. I swear I didn’t do anything except shake his hand and remind him her curfew is 10pm. Am I in the wrong here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 107

The Top

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 862

You deserved it 11 396

Today, while outside, a bug flew up my nose. After I told my family and friends about a faint vibrating in my upper nostril, they all convinced me I was paranoid. That was until that night when I blew my nose and there was the bug in my tissue. Its leg was still twitching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 173

You deserved it 2 518

Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 535

You deserved it 1 108

Today, I noticed my ex had unblocked me on Facebook. Since I still miss her and haven't been able to find love since our breakup, I sent her a friend request, thinking maybe she was leaving the door open for me, and we could reconcile. Apparently I was wrong because she promptly blocked me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 1 675

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. Then I found another note on a can that said, "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 565

You deserved it 688 725

Today, things were getting heated with my girlfriend, so I tried taking her shirt off. Slapping my hands away, she said, "I was only dating you to get my self-confidence up, I'm good now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 224

You deserved it 4 270