Intimacy: Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss...

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 17:39 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 648

You deserved it 2 341

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

By Dhagiik - 24/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Oak Park

Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 183

You deserved it 1 145

By Sleeper_C3ll - 04/02/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 119

You deserved it 2 878

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 640

You deserved it 289

Wanker

By Sandman2015 - 29/01/2016 18:36 - United States - American Fork

Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 366

You deserved it 1 928

Skill issue

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 695

You deserved it 1 914

Promoted!

By Worst Way To Get Promoted - 25/09/2019 16:00

Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 031

You deserved it 163

Wanker

By fired - 09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 257

You deserved it 7 487

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 614

You deserved it 4 741

By Walk of Shame - 13/11/2018 22:00

Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 6 030

By OhGodWhy - 29/12/2016 23:30 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 763

You deserved it 885

MolesterStallone 13

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:08

Sounds like he was doing his own performance assessment!

Icejza_DaChilla 7

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:09

*sniff sniff* What's that smell..? It smells like blackmail to me!

Comments

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:24

Talk him into giving you a "semi"annual assessment from now on. This way you'll be able to get a raise every 6months due to your performance.(:

Welshite 39

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:24

Act like nothing is wrong while making subtle insinuations that you saw him. Make him nervous enough with the thought that you'll spread rumors...instant raise. Or instant termination. But you've got to hope for the best!

mommy_me 4

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:26

Ew, Sucks for you! FLY i Wouldn't Be Able To Look At Him For At Least A Week

DracoSpirita 21

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:41

I can't even look at all those caps.

I_lost_the_game 25

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:58

FLY? Your suggestion to OP is that he should sprout wings and flap off?

BatemanFML 0

Wednesday 22 August 2012 7:53

40- I'm sure it's just a book title he was referencing.

on_the_flip_side 0

Saturday 25 August 2012 17:46

Oh gosh. All the caps... It's so difficult to read with all the improper grammar.

dog1999 2

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:36

Looks like someone's getting a raise

olpally 32

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:41

Herbert the pervert is ridickulous...

Everclear92 2

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:46

awkward.....

xDropsOfJupiterx 8

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:47

The question is, what did his boss do when he walked in?

Dracoboxer357 35

Wednesday 22 August 2012 1:08

45- Looked him dead in the eyes and finished....like a boss. :p (Sorry but it was the only time that saying seemed to finally fit!) ;P

supportcommand 17

Wednesday 22 August 2012 5:36

O.P. walks in. Boss turns around without even slowing down says "oh hey, just rubbin' one out, see you in my office in five. Finishes. Zips up and walks out.