Animals: Today, I was ambushed by a very angry beaver. FML

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By Anonymous - 05/11/2010 21:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I was ambushed by a very angry beaver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 689

You deserved it 5 354

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Same thing different taste

Mystery

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 274

You deserved it 4 713

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Today, I tried to take a selfie with a squirrel and it bit me. FML

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You deserved it 1 385

By LennyComa - 19/03/2017 00:00

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By Anonymous - 04/04/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to take a cute selfie on a hiking trip. As I leaned against a boulder to get the perfect shot, a squirrel jumped out of nowhere and attacked me, probably thinking I was after its food. I dropped my phone into a creek, and my friends took a picture of me freaking out instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 392

Bee Movie 2: Electric Boogaloo

By Anonymous - 11/06/2021 13:01 - United States - Steele

Today, my "friends" who know very well that I am terrified of bees forced me to face my fears, despite my protesting. As my "friends" watched and laughed while I tried to keep calm, a wasp showed up and scared me half to death, thereby angering the other bees. My face looked like a giant raspberry after the fact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 098

You deserved it 138

Oh dear…

By Wet Britches - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Portland

Today, on my rush to get home from work to use the bathroom, I hit a deer. It startled me so badly that I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 040

You deserved it 1 739

By skunked - 18/06/2013 18:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was visiting my childhood home, and I checked out my old treehouse. A family of skunks had made it their home, and I was promptly sprayed upon entering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 398

You deserved it 7 077

By Betchsadface - 13/07/2010 04:34 - United States

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 778

You deserved it 10 797

The chase

By Paula - 05/11/2024 12:00 - Canada

Today, I went for a "relaxing" walk on a local trail. I got chased by an angry goose halfway back to my car. Apparently, it didn’t appreciate my "peaceful" attempt to take a selfie with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91

You deserved it 927

By xacked - 02/06/2009 06:39 - United States

Today, I was designing a newspaper page with a story about an aggressive female bird that was defending its nest and attacking students near some stairs. In the article were photos of victims who were attacked. We had a good laugh over it. Later, I was walking there and the bird attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 434

You deserved it 61 677

awzmness 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:13

what the ****?

higz 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:19

Norbert or Daggett?

Comments

DatingScaresMe 2

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:32

If only you were a man and the comment metaphorical.

mdog1114 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:34

that's chuckalicious

camjgog_88 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:36

somehow I don't think this has to do w/animals lol

zemo999 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:38

gee Ward, you were pretty hard on the Beaver last night!!

Tmoney541 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:44

Hahahahahahah

chevonfinley 8

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:44

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa!!!!!!!

FirstBornUnicorn 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:51

She was amBushed by a beaver. lol

MangoFruit 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:52

haha lol:)

GaryBusey1121 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:53

OMG you don't have eyes!!!! where are your eyes

imsogangster13 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:55

hahaha . this made me chucklee :D

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The Top

Today, I was with my seven year-old daughter purchasing my husband a present for his birthday in a few weeks. At the register, in the very long line, I asked her where we could hide his present so he wouldn't find it. She loudly responded, "Hide it in your room! He never goes in there!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 683

You deserved it 5 040

Today, I’m so over my boyfriend smoking too many cigarettes, and I hate cigarettes. The smell is just disgusting and plus it makes my nose stuffy. And he gets ashes everywhere. Plus he always leaves his room a mess. Other than him being financially stable and fun, he's such a slob. FML

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You deserved it 771

The Top

Today, it was my the last day of my time off work for my birthday weekend and I had so much fun, but I was thinking about my ex-fiancé for a lot of the time because I still haven’t gotten closure with that situation. All I wanna do is SCREAM because I just turned 30, got dumped and have to keep on going. FML

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You deserved it 227

Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML

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You deserved it 3 635

Today, I went on a relaxing nature hike to de-stress. I got lost for hours, encountered a bear, and had to play dead, only for the bear to steal my sandwich then sit there for hours before finally leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 174

Today, it's Saturday night, and also Halloween. Instead of going out, I'm sitting at home on MSN telling everyone who asks me what I'm doing tonight that I'm 'going out in 10 minutes to a party', then when 10 minutes pass, I block them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 650

You deserved it 26 366

Today, it's day two of my two-month summer job on a Mediterranean cruise ship. I'm incredibly seasick, and the ship is still docked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 031

You deserved it 4 781

Today, I’d been dying to escape my dreary hometown, but had panic attacks at the thought of being on my own, but at last, I'd found a place I could afford. Turns out, the guy I was going to rent from was just arrested for murdering his last tenant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 282

You deserved it 339