Love: Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night...

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 920

You deserved it 10 325

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 787

You deserved it 297

By ak. - 02/03/2009 21:26 - United States

Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 701

You deserved it 11 368

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 889

You deserved it 7 259

Party animal

By Laci - 30/04/2011 17:50 - United States

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 932

You deserved it 23 218

By Harry Dare - 02/09/2011 16:31 - United Kingdom

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 4 322

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 676

You deserved it 4 572

Completely wet

By Anonymous - 27/02/2020 20:00

Today, I was drinking too much and I have to pee constantly, so I went to bed without my girlfriend. Hours later she woke me up wanting sex, but she realized that I pissed the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 2 035

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 393

By scatter00x - 08/02/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 095

You deserved it 7 096

bonafidehustler 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 23:10

Yeah, this would definitely be way funnier from her perspective.

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 23 May 2009 23:30

Eh, I wanted to throw up before from smelling someone's bad breath. But also, if you were both drinking the night before, throwing up in the morning isn't that difficult to do. Anything could've pushed you over, whether it'd be breakfast, noise, or your girlfriend's breath. Now, if you hadn't been drinking, then... FYL. There's a difference.

Comments

ammali 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 3:54

Um... I'm guessing that you were both nauseous and both had bad breath after a night of drinking! Booze dries you out and that makes breath worse... This isn't an FML unless you count the being hung over.

ELFENMAGICLOLZ 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 4:44

I have a feeling the puking was mostly the result of your drinking..

dan81892 2

Sunday 24 May 2009 5:22

f her life, i would feel bad if i did that to a girlfriend of mine.

Sanrio90 8

Sunday 24 May 2009 5:27

hahaahha This is so sweet...yet so damn nasty. Aww

jSOPURE 3

Sunday 24 May 2009 5:37

Aww. You are loved. :)

InspiredByGaGa 8

Sunday 24 May 2009 5:38

#18- what this person said.

illeyad 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 6:41

don't try and blame your girl friend for this one- if you were both drinking last night, than it is likely that you both had bad breath. That said, I bet you would have gotten sick weather she breathed omn you or not considering that it sounds like you had one heck of a hang over, she just triggered it faster.

paperboat_fml 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 6:48

Obviously you puked because you were hungover as EFF. For everyone who's saying he deserved it, he really didn't.. he was hungover, and smells definitely make someone puke. :S And # 70, he never did blame his gf. And I bet your gf understood, if you explained haha.

shoegal808 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 8:18

Well a night of drinking isn't exactly gonna do her breath a favour. Yours most likely would've smelt just as bad. Sucks that the fact she said "I love you" didn't make up for her breath though.