Health: Today, I was expecting a very important work call. Today was...

By phonesnshit - 29/05/2010 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was expecting a very important work call. Today was also the day I got insuppressible diarrhea. As I was running to the washroom, the phone rang. I didn't make it to the washroom or the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 205

You deserved it 3 493

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Same thing different taste

Timing

By iliterallypoopedmyself - 19/01/2012 01:54 - Australia

Today, I anxiously waited 8 hours for an important phone call. The phone rang while I was sitting on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 767

You deserved it 3 884

By TheHeirofTime - 15/08/2016 15:11 - United States - Marlborough

Today, I had to cancel an appointment due to diarrhea. I was so nervous that when the receptionist asked why, I told her, "I can't stop shitting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 256

You deserved it 1 735

By Poopie - 29/01/2011 06:06 - Canada

Today, after suffering from constipation for three days, I finally took a dump. Just as things reached the point of no return, my land line and doorbell all rang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 222

You deserved it 3 219

Hey guys, check this out

By Sonic - 15/01/2010 16:50 - United States

Today, I was on a conference call while in the bathroom with all the important people in my district. I thought my phone was on mute, so I took the opportunity to flush the toilet. Turns out, that my phone wasn't on mute, and everyone heard it. I'm the only one who was on the conference call outside of work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 450

You deserved it 30 916

By Crap - 30/07/2015 00:57 - United States - Seminole

Today, I had horrible diarrhea at work. When I felt the bubbling, I ran to the bathroom. An agonizing bowel movement later, I realized that there was no toilet paper in the stall. Just as I was about to ask a coworker who was in the bathroom for some, the fire alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 178

You deserved it 1 709

By ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 566

You deserved it 44 721

Walk, don't run

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 03:00 - Finland

Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 21:34 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 021

You deserved it 5 401

By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 644

You deserved it 9 143

By yolo is for shitheads - 09/10/2012 16:07 - United States

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 440

You deserved it 2 168

kamkak 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 12:24

why didn't you just have a portable phone with you?

towboatdude 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 12:28

Op sounds like you wound up in a shity situation there! I know I'm wrong for that but I couldn't pass it up...

Comments

Melvar_10 3

Saturday 29 May 2010 22:00

nvm ignore my comment, I fail Damn it anti-flood, you zombie moderating thingie Y won't it go away?! It keeps doing this to me!

Melvar_10 3

Saturday 29 May 2010 22:05

Ok, people should really stop hatin on Canada, and I'm american. Canada is a good place for retirees, due to it's peacfulness and it's healthcare. Canada rarely encounters problems like the USA does. However, they aren't exactly the most rich and powerful country ever. Btw, USA isn't either, but we are wealthier.... I think. lol People should just leave Canada alone, they never do anything to others.

Melvar_10 3

Saturday 29 May 2010 22:28

Some people are just that way. I for one wish to go and enjoy Canada

SACaveman 3

Saturday 29 May 2010 22:34

Now thats a shitty situation to find yourself in eh.. Still sucks though..

givemechange 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 22:51

#52, ya id probably hate Canada too If i didnt have universal healthcare, either. Get a life. It's sad you have to resort to making lame jokes about another country because you can't think of anything witty to say thats actually relevant to the OP's FML. (Yes, I realize the hypocrisy of what I just said, but **** 52. Hes a doofus.)

alex112094 5

Sunday 30 May 2010 0:33

ummmm 52 I have stupid or what? I've got a cell phone dipwad I live in montreal. I bet your american too??

cmac86 23

Sunday 30 May 2010 1:13

cordless phone. keep it with you. or your cell phone. that's what pockets are for. unless you leave your pants in another room, which would be really weird.