Intimacy: Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning...

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 04:59 - United States

Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 216

You deserved it 2 756

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Same thing different taste

First day

By notsogoodtrainee - 09/07/2015 17:02 - United States - Fargo

Today, at my first day of work, I was impressing my trainer with my skills by carrying many trays at once. Well, I could until I came around a corner and ran into a customer. With food all over his front, he introduced himself to me as the head manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 636

You deserved it 4 802

Perv

By WhyMe - 09/04/2017 22:00

Today, at work, a customer was staring at me for a long time. Hoping to break the awkwardness, I asked him what brought him to the store today. He complimented me on my friendly demeanor, then followed up with, "Since you're so friendly, how about coming in the bathroom with me and giving me a hand?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 378

You deserved it 386

By Smile No More - 13/05/2011 12:27

Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 145

You deserved it 5 970

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 08:49 - United States - Crestview

Today, we were running a special at work that I had previously been told was an online-only special. After the general manager corrected me, I used the joke excuse of, "It's my first day". The customer replied, "I can tell". I've worked there two years and I'm the assistant manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 378

You deserved it 5 213

By Neveragain - 01/07/2013 05:49 - United States - Tampa

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 092

You deserved it 5 410

By oooops - 24/01/2011 19:18 - United States

Today, was my first day at a new job. I was really pleased with how much positive attention I was getting in a mainly male office. Guess whose shirt was see-through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 744

You deserved it 36 282

By Anonymous - 20/10/2009 02:38 - United States

Today, I walked into work, and the first question my boss asks me is "Are those your pajamas?" I was wearing my favorite outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 895

You deserved it 9 488

By niceboss - 25/11/2010 02:32 - Singapore

Today, on my first day of work, my new boss treated me to lunch. Thinking she was really nice, I thanked her for the treat. She fixed me with a cold, unsmiling stare and said, "Oh, don't thank me. I'm being paid to do this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 727

You deserved it 2 724

Thanks Susan

By Noname - 24/02/2009 23:00 - United States

Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman who sits at the desk beside me looks over and says, "Wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 290

You deserved it 4 927

By JoLaFritte - 07/11/2008 10:10 - France

Today, thinking that I was alone at work, I started rummaging through my nose, trying to find something interesting. It was only after about a minute that I noticed that my boss was looking straight at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 952

You deserved it 50 431

bettyc4 26

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:52

Bonerific

FalconCrunch 4

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:55

Are you hideous? It could be the zombie apocalypse he was referring to.

Comments

kreepers 6

Thursday 26 January 2012 10:03

I would be clueless. Infact, I'm clueless.

SluggerJ 7

Thursday 26 January 2012 10:16

Walmart greeter? I'm in the same boat. It's the customers problem not yours...

tylerryder 4

Thursday 26 January 2012 10:38

Huh?

kemando 22

Thursday 26 January 2012 12:48

Maybe he thinks you're a robot, and the "invasion" has begun.

Pelreskovich 11

Thursday 26 January 2012 13:01

Someone thinks you are delicious!

1poohbear5 7

Sunday 29 January 2012 18:02

Omg we have the same birthday!!! Sorry tht was random! Hahaha

CRC_101 31

Thursday 26 January 2012 13:52

He has already figured out you're starting your first day! He could become a certified stalker! *gasp* Watch out! O_O

Johnny6speed 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 15:46

Was there a big wet spot I'm his jeans after that? (I would think semen but I guess it could also be urine)

CeruleanThree 8

Thursday 26 January 2012 17:39

This would be a great time to use the Jenna Marbles look.

Shleebs 12

Thursday 26 January 2012 17:44

Your comment is so full of win.

perdix 29

Thursday 26 January 2012 17:40

This is "Intimate?!?!" I wish there were a category, "Mildly suggestive, but only to mediocre-looking girls desperate for attention and validation."

moop256 10

Thursday 26 January 2012 19:41

Ouch didi you know Perdix is very sensitive about his erectile disfunction... That was cold man

perdix 29

Thursday 26 January 2012 19:46

I didn't really get that. Was it clearer in a previous version? "It's starting" just sounds like looking at her means a good morning is starting. I'm sure it can be said in a very creepy way that makes it sound disgusting, but I don't see where a boner can be inferred.

perdix 29

Thursday 26 January 2012 22:11

Haha, Didi, I would have said, "Launch sequence initiated," because I'm a nerd perv! ;)

bizarre_ftw 21

Saturday 28 January 2012 4:21

*facepalm* I just feel like a idiot. I have a whole list of possible things that could have been starting (the entirety of which can be found in comment 126) yet I didn't get boner! >.< (or zombie apocalypse for that matter. I got apocalypse, sure. But zombie? That went completely over my head) I bow to the masters *bows* -afterthought- oh! And thanks for answering my question :)