Miscellaneous: Today, I was having a conversation with my girlfriend about having...

By Spac3Ghost - 28/12/2009 17:08 - China

Today, I was having a conversation with my girlfriend about having kids. We were outside a hotel in front of those rotating glass doors. One of my friends ran at me as a joke, screaming like a caveman. I freaked out in a high pitched squeal, and tried to run inside the hotel. I ran in the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 630

You deserved it 26 330

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/06/2009 02:06 - Canada

Today, I was visiting my friend's new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughter's. I'm a 37 year old male. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 752

You deserved it 7 383

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 071

You deserved it 5 417

By nitroman64 - 30/07/2010 23:40 - United States

Today, I was visiting my girlfriend at her house. We heard the door bell ring. She told me to jump out the window thinking it was her dad. I jumped, landed wrong, and got hurt. It turns out we were ding-dong-ditched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 877

You deserved it 28 294

By BIZZMAL - 05/01/2011 02:44 - United States

Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 312

You deserved it 32 629

By johnboy - 09/11/2010 17:08 - United States

Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 835

You deserved it 37 146

Skittish

By sheWontbeOnMyZombieApocteam - 12/07/2015 19:56 - United States - Killeen

Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 112

You deserved it 2 877

By D.J. - 25/01/2014 01:34 - United States - Houston

Today, I ran into my apartment and let one rip, since I'd been holding it the whole elevator ride up. My parents had let themselves in while I was out, and laughed at me for a good 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 894

You deserved it 6 525

Didn't see ya there

By stillhurting - 05/01/2014 21:45 - Canada - Langley

Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 745

You deserved it 7 567

By Anonymous - 28/10/2015 15:09 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of footsteps outside my room. I investigated but found nothing. As I went back to my room, I heard a sort of giggling from inside. I was so scared, I grabbed my car keys, got the fuck out of there, and drove to my girlfriend's house in my pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 630

You deserved it 3 138

Bounce off

By clumsy girl - 25/09/2023 12:30 - United States - Austin

Today, I embraced my inner child and went to a trampoline park with friends. I was having a blast until I attempted a somersault and ended up bouncing right into a group of screaming toddlers. I was escorted out by a concerned parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 745

Muhfin 0

Monday 28 December 2009 23:23

Did we really need to know about talking to your gf about having kids??? FYL for being a dork

glasswater 0

Monday 28 December 2009 23:23

This is a) not an FML and b) horribly written and pretty much unintelligible. But from what I can deduce, you can't figure out revolving doors, which is sad. Don't think about having children again until you can figure out how to enter and exit a building.

Comments

PistenDeer 0

Monday 25 October 2010 4:54

12000 people are ******* idiot. How the hell did he deserve this?!

chantellesmith 0

Monday 17 January 2011 12:49

this is a) not a very nice thing to say and b) is an fml. k thanks bye :L

chantellesmith 0

Monday 17 January 2011 12:51

sorry this was ment to be a reply but clicked the wrong button:L

Jimster1712 0

Sunday 10 April 2011 15:58

a story from china.. cool

kungfukittyrawr 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 21:33

what does this have to do with kids?

Midnightpearls 13

Friday 8 July 2011 8:29

kind of badly written. the whole first sentence was full of superfluous information

bizarre_ftw 21

Wednesday 7 December 2011 21:14

Well if you win and you two do decide to have a kid at least you won't have to worry about baby proofing the house. After that stunt I'm guessing your girlfriend is already planning on doing so