Miscellaneous: Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my...

By Anonymous - 23/10/2011 05:30 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my uncle. I had my door open. She said, "Yeah my son doesn't know I have his phone password. Girls nowadays are real sluts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 612

You deserved it 8 854

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Same thing different taste

By ... - 18/02/2018 01:30

Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 391

You deserved it 5 620

By Momlovesme - 08/08/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 249

You deserved it 17 459

By ali grace - 14/05/2011 11:15 - United States

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124 629

You deserved it 17 935

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 416

You deserved it 2 688

Judgmental much!?

By Stairway2Heaven - 02/03/2009 21:03 - Canada

Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 657

You deserved it 19 448

Confusing family

By confused - 25/01/2015 03:26 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, my mom came into my room to yell at me because she thought she heard me having sex, saying I'm too young for it. I'm 23 and I wasn't having sex. The noises were from my dad watching porn in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 345

You deserved it 2 968

Good job parenting

By yova - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 524

You deserved it 1 958

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 00:02 - Guatemala - Guatemala City

Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 808

You deserved it 6 574

By ugadawgs09 - 02/11/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 507

You deserved it 14 241

By bubbalicious - 13/08/2009 20:57 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 709

You deserved it 87 004

JTthePurpleNinja 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:08

They're just jealous because you're getting some! :)

Epic_Fail911 15

Sunday 23 October 2011 12:13

your mom needs a boyfriend

Comments

daydreamer244 13

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:29

oh wow what a snooper.

ThaBeasty01 5

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:58

my mom did that to me once, I put it so she could only see the bane of who texted, not the actual text .. and I put a password(: !

SAgirl 13

Sunday 23 October 2011 16:59

Shes right

chloeeXD 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 17:00

If my parents read my texts between me and my boyfriend I'd be dead(;

chloeeXD 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 17:04

He needs to mind **** her!!!

TheQuerv 4

Sunday 23 October 2011 17:57

Lol!

ih82bl8 2

Sunday 23 October 2011 18:07

Aaaahahaha!!! Change it and laugh in her face

amb12345 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 18:53

Smh... Parents these days hahaha

blowfishy69 8

Sunday 23 October 2011 19:55

im a teenager, but frankly. #91 is right.

Wrekonize 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 20:08

Momz r nozy bro

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got home after a long day and decided to unwind a bit. I put some porn on the TV but promptly fell asleep. I woke up three hours later to the same video playing, but realized a had left my blinds open. I broadcasted three hours of Athena Faris having sex to my whole street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 453

Today, I met one of my fiancé's coworkers. Normally I'd never ask how far along someone's pregnancy is without being 100% sure they're not just fat, but she seemed fit. Well, I now know that virtually all the fat in some people's bodies can go straight to their gut and nowhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 834

You deserved it 6 356

The Top

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 568

You deserved it 41 810

Today, I opened the cabinet to take a pill for my headache. After taking the pill, I turned around and smashed my head on the open cabinet door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 395

You deserved it 7 642

Today, I told my “best friend” that I'd tested positive for COVID-19. She told me to “chill”. Ten years of friendship and she didn’t even ask if I was OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 119

You deserved it 274

Today, I put my “I love NY” t-shirt on inside out by accident. When I went to a coffee shop, the barista asked, “What’s with the weird NY shirt?” I replied, “I don’t know, it’s just my thing.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 218

You deserved it 703

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend. He actually had the balls to say her leg was asleep and he was trying to wake it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 476

You deserved it 358

Today, some things that are hard for many people are easy for me, like learning languages, being thrifty, and organizing my life efficiently. On the other hand, some things that are easy for most people are near impossible for me, like feeling well-rested after 8 hours of sleep. Or converting food into energy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 147