Animals: Today, I was taking a poop when I heard a window in my house...

By Alaska - 29/10/2015 03:35 - United States

Today, I was taking a poop when I heard a window in my house break. Then, I heard things dropping upstairs. I decided to stay in the bathroom, which has a lock, and called the cops. Turns out it was just a bird that was trying to get at my fish in the fish tank that I have in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 877

You deserved it 2 521

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Same thing different taste

By Sarah1330 - 25/02/2015 04:33 - United States

Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 408

You deserved it 3 346

Crime scene

By xTRYSOFTx - 07/03/2020 03:00 - United States

Today, I called the police because I thought a burglar had broken into our house. I found out the strange noise was just my dog fucking about, so I smashed a small window and kicked down a door so I wouldn't be embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 2 191

By Olive14 - 15/12/2010 06:15

Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 087

You deserved it 7 345

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 11:40 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I woke up to noises from downstairs. I practically pissed my pants and called the cops. Turned out it was just my cat being a dickhead in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 734

You deserved it 5 813

By Sassers - 03/12/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, I heard a loud crashing noise. I ran into the kitchen to see what it was. My cat had knocked over my fish bowl and had my Beta in her mouth. After scolding her and rescuing it, I decided to clean its bowl. When I went to dump some of the water in the sink, my fish went down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 853

You deserved it 35 020

Ratatouille

By Anonymous - 16/10/2020 08:02

Today, after my house almost got broken into last week, when I heard some noises in the kitchen I went to investigate. I saw a huge rat run across my floor, and nearly peed myself thinking it was an intruder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 172

Suspicious minds

By abusedparrot - 24/08/2014 12:40 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, the police knocked on my door, saying that they needed to investigate my house for animal abuse. Apparently the neighbours called, reporting a "screeching bird in pain". I have no bird, but I have been singing quite loudly recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 258

You deserved it 6 137

By Anonymous - 05/08/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 550

You deserved it 4 552

By Anonymous - 20/10/2009 10:56 - Australia

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 227

You deserved it 6 134

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 193

You deserved it 241

MrsPegg 45

Thursday 29 October 2015 16:33

So a bird busted through a glass door/window to go after your fish? That's one helluva determined (and sturdy) bird! What did the cops say?

mds9986 24

Thursday 29 October 2015 16:34

At least you played it safe when you heard some fishy sounds in your house.

Comments

itsalanis 25

Thursday 29 October 2015 19:54

Yeah, get that jailbird!

aeryn97 17

Thursday 29 October 2015 21:41

you've made my day. lol. glad you're ok and safe

Sudoc 29

Friday 30 October 2015 1:26

But...it could have been a predator!

sailorarctic 22

Friday 30 October 2015 2:47

i can't properly vote on this because you did the smart thing. if it had been an intruder you potentially saved your own life by not confronting them. good on you OP.

GAeroNKissR 26

Friday 30 October 2015 4:55

Maybe there was an intruder & the bird flew in after. That's less embarrassing. On the other hand, you get more peace of mind knowing it was just a bird. but just think...what if the intruder is still inside...hiding...& waiting. Ok, goodnight!

Hildy93 21

Friday 30 October 2015 6:52

I just want to know if the fish fish died

Goblin182 26

Friday 30 October 2015 12:11

I had a friend call the cops on a B&E. finally figured out a squirrel had come down an old chimney.

Cherry83_fml 3

Friday 30 October 2015 20:03

This is funny but at the same time you played it safe. Glad you're ok! is the bird going to pay for the broken window? =P

Xion0014 20

Saturday 31 October 2015 11:06

Whats your window made out of? Ice? I could never imagine a bird breaking through a window for fish xD.. That is unless it was a hawk, eagle or crow maybe