Miscellaneous: Today, I watched in horror from the doorway as my brother furiously...

By GROSS - 07/03/2015 15:58 - Bangladesh

Today, I watched in horror from the doorway as my brother furiously scratched at his greasy hair and ate the large flakes of dead skin that came loose from his scalp. I think our real dad might be caged in a zoo somewhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 562

You deserved it 2 535

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By my dumb bro - 17/04/2013 16:13 - United States - Gillham

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 404

You deserved it 8 763

Eye bleach

By deardaughter - 14/08/2019 06:00 - Australia

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 802

You deserved it 120

By TimeForAHairCut - 08/06/2012 23:44 - United States - Eugene

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 998

You deserved it 2 109

Hang in there

By R Kelly's scapegoat - 10/12/2022 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was haunted by the knowledge that my father watched me slit my wrists without doing a damn thing or batting an eyelid, but when I took the steak knife to the breadboard to release my tension, he was so upset, he took the dog, drove to the east coast, and spent the night in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 710

By not as scarred as he should be - 18/10/2012 18:19 - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 764

You deserved it 3 342

By baldygirl - 02/11/2009 20:04 - United States

Today, my 7 year old brother decided that it would be fun to cut off my hair. I woke from a long nap after working the late shift, to about 15 inches of my long blonde hair all over my bed and floor. I now have bloody bald spots and really choppy hair about 3 inches long. He got away with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 002

You deserved it 3 532

By alanh69 - 26/08/2014 19:12 - United States - Woodward

Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 309

You deserved it 6 409

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 896

You deserved it 2 331

Fact of scratching

By Anonymous - 24/01/2020 14:00

Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 410

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 25/06/2010 00:14 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 97 966

You deserved it 6 544

cutycat136 28

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:18

I couldn't even finish reading about this without gagging so I'm really sorry to OP for having to witness it.

Flaming_Pandas 15

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:22

I hear that pouring bleach in your eyes can help to unsee things such as this. Best of luck.

Comments

Kitty_Kat44 31

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:23

That is so nasty! Maybe you should have a talk with him about it and save him the embarrassment of other people witnessing this.

Jinxsie 27

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:25

That's... I don't even know. Hose him down!

Dimps94 9

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:25

Shit... That is nasty. You should tell him that , that is nasty.

Destinee_1 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:27

That's disgusting

lauralabia3 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:33

yikes! that's pretty nasty!

laaryssa 21

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:37

I can't even handle this

hailzz_96 18

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:38

Don't knock it til ya try it

kWat19 10

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:59

Gross. He should go on that show My Strange Addiction, people do weird stuff like that all the time on that show.

LoverWordsFood 27

Sunday 8 March 2015 6:03

Note to self: don't eat or drink anything when reading through FML. World's greatest advice right there. I can't finish my chips and salsa without thinking of crunchy scalp...*gag*

militarybrat 21

Sunday 8 March 2015 6:16

Its actually a mental disorder, so really FHL.

SorryNotSorryyy 13

Monday 9 March 2015 19:58

What is the mental disorder that causes you to think it is ok to eat your own dandruff?

vintageart1994 16

Tuesday 10 March 2015 5:54

Yea, ur right. I've heard it has to do with an anxiety disorder

Rababco 29

Sunday 15 May 2016 5:00

Well, there's trichotillomania, which is the compulsive urge to pull one's own hair out and is part of OCD but I don't think it involves eating parts of one's scalp so I'm not sure what you are referring to.