Animals: Today, I watched Paranormal Activity, which is known to be "the...

By J…… - 24/11/2009 18:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I watched Paranormal Activity, which is known to be "the scariest film ever." After the film, I went to brush my teeth and out of the corner of my eye I saw the bathroom door closing by itself. I jumped out of my skin and stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush. It was just my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 624

You deserved it 35 497

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Same thing different taste

By Ariel_Mariaa - 04/11/2011 23:25 - Canada

Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 531

You deserved it 4 288

By toni405 - 21/07/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 774

You deserved it 11 474

By Anonymous - 09/08/2018 20:30

Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 690

You deserved it 3 371

Jump scare

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 051

You deserved it 14 019

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/07/2020 02:03

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 567

By nackpattywhackgiveadogabone - 23/09/2010 11:01 - United States

Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 079

You deserved it 50 518

By fearofzombies - 13/08/2009 18:17 - United States

Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 310

You deserved it 13 256

By Noname - 09/11/2008 09:18 - France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 689

You deserved it 13 854

Monster in my bathroom

By Thescarlettfox - 16/02/2020 01:00

Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 452

You deserved it 875

By downgirl - 04/11/2015 06:02 - United States - Norman

Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 221

You deserved it 2 384

dangit714 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 23:12

That movie wasn't scary. It's just 5 minutes of two people sleeping on a camera, then the frickin' door moves. It was a waste of my time to see and obviously the worst horror movie I have seen so far. YDI for being a god damn pussy.

Lucky2u 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 23:18

known to be the scariest movie ever? that movie was worse than the Blair witch project. complete trash and ydi for being scared of it.

Comments

FlaminYawn 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 0:18

Worst movie ever. Out of curiosity I watched it online on my 24" monitor, by myself, at 2am in my guest room. Didn't scare me one bit, it was all fake. If that was real footage then maybe, but how can something so fake scare people? Never understood that.

futtgoredo 0

Saturday 13 February 2010 5:37

at the end of the movie there is a disclaimer stating that all of the events and characters are fictious

anonymous69_fml 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 0:29

at least you didn't stab your dog

hmf_74 0

Friday 27 November 2009 5:22

If I am not mistaken it was rated R because of language, If I remember correctly they said f*ck every f*cking sentence they f*cking had in the f*cking movie because they were trying to emphasize how f*cking scared they were because of the f*cking demon thing whatever in their f*cking house. lol sorry, had to take the opportunity. (and I was responding to someone but this is in a totally weird spot.)