Miscellaneous: Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of...

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By Anonymous - 17/10/2010 06:28 - United States

Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 131

You deserved it 30 395

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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 203

You deserved it 4 084

By mydadforgetsme - 04/11/2015 17:26 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 694

You deserved it 1 471

The blame game

By Anonymous - 12/01/2016 14:44

Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 794

You deserved it 1 914

By msj137 - 17/07/2009 07:25 - United States

Today, I had a softball tournament which also landed on my birthday. My dad had to leave town for work, so he left me a card on my night stand. Instead of a happy birthday, all it said was 'Don't mess up the game for everyone'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 165

You deserved it 2 851

By ZeroApostle4Ever - 23/02/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 086

You deserved it 6 607

By Kyle - 05/01/2012 06:58 - United States

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 924

You deserved it 35 973

By Happy Birthday - 10/07/2018 15:00

Today, my Dad gave me my birthday card. The envelope was blank, as was the card, and the £0.25 price tag was still on. He was fully aware of all these things, but handed it to me and said, "By the way, I didn't write anything." Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 587

You deserved it 253

By rowie1311 - 27/03/2011 18:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 613

You deserved it 31 064

Lovely parents

By sigh - 18/11/2019 01:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my parents forgot it was my birthday. They ordered me to scrub the common bathroom, and when I asked if they remembered, my dad's reaction was "Oh! Really?" My mom's was "I thought that it was next week." What lovely parents I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 343

You deserved it 203

Genius

By Anonymous - 25/04/2014 21:42 - United States - Red Bank

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am NOT a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 524

You deserved it 14 389

FATSQUIRELL69 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:23

lmfao hahah your dad is funny, hes just probably joking around, most parents do that

breenntt 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:23

lmao. this made my day.

Comments

keepmeonthedl 7

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:47

That's horrible but funny at the same time. If he was joking, that is.

LAXgurlie28 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:49

lmbo, it's okay. Next time give him a pack of pencils.

Paula231_fml 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:49

Dude you're dad is funny I want him he's a Win!

flashback.miss 28

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:54

lol this reminds me of a pic I saw. instead of a man.. it was a sorrowful looking girl... erasing a big YOU. but OP... he loves you though, right? Then in that case-- you can be considered a surprising 'accident'/ mistake....

bigredmonkeybutt 28

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:56

Get a sense of humor. Your dad's joke was a lot better than yours. YDI

perdix 29

Sunday 17 October 2010 16:57

You ought to hook up with that girl who wanted a tattoo -- you can start a whole family of mistakes where each kid is more ****** up than the one before. Like the Kardashians.

flashback.miss 28

Sunday 17 October 2010 17:03

@ 20 lol :) but does the world really need that :)

FFML_314 11

Sunday 17 October 2010 17:00

Your dad is a genius. The best lines are swift and well delivered. You should inspire to be just like him.

dudeitsdanny 9

Sunday 17 October 2010 18:47

Aspire. You mean aspire.

perdix 29

Sunday 17 October 2010 19:25

Leave her alone. She's so cute, she can say whatever she likes! ;)

RedPillSucks 31

Sunday 17 October 2010 20:04

how about 'expire'?

perdix 29

Sunday 17 October 2010 21:32

Expire, perspire, it wouldn't matter. Do you see that smile? She could say "Ass Pyre" and I'd know what she's talking about.

dudeitsdanny 9

Monday 18 October 2010 0:35

Now she can be cute AND know the right word =) Especially since inspire seems to be wayyy too opposite in this case, lol.

FFML_314 11

Monday 18 October 2010 1:27

Boo! Yes, I meant aspire, but my brain was in over time from working the 15 hours prior and no sleep, so give me a break :P Thanks, Perdix. LOL! I wish my smile excused me from making mistakes!