Miscellaneous: Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around...

By squishy - 11/02/2010 00:07 - United States

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 471

You deserved it 25 610

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Same thing different taste

By Zedscar - 15/07/2017 22:30 - United States - Martinsburg

Today, my 8-year-old nephew told me he liked the way I smelt. Apparently I smell like "cat food and cheese." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 866

You deserved it 647

By Noname - 03/02/2009 20:25 - United States

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 737

You deserved it 7 802

By girlmeetsworld - 18/02/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, my four-year-old cousin gave me a hug, basically stuffing his face into my crotch. Then he pulled it out and said "Ew, that's stinky" in front of my entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 137

You deserved it 13 659

By anon - 23/03/2015 02:24 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 330

You deserved it 2 937

By sigsigsignify - 06/12/2018 14:00

Today, my 3 year old future niece was combing my hair while I was watching a movie with the future in-laws. She kept leaving saying she was going to "go get the comb wet". I assumed she meant in the bathroom sink. Turns out she was just going around behind the couch and licking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 435

Nice of her

By Bill - 06/12/2009 20:28 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 967

You deserved it 18 122

By Anonymous - 12/04/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old niece brushed my hair, making sure to be gentle so she wouldn't hurt me. When it was time to brush the front, she made sure to meticulously brush my mustache. I'm a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 319

You deserved it 1 049

By Lickmebaby - 12/02/2017 11:00 - United Kingdom - Enfield

Today, I woke up to see my 8-year-old cousin licking my hand. All of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 751

You deserved it 521

No filter

By Judiee - 28/02/2009 10:52 - United States

Today, I was introduced to my boyfriend's family at a family reunion for the first time. As I sat on the couch, his 4 year-old sister comes in and jumps onto my lap. For a moment I was happy to think his sister liked me, only to hear her say, "You're fat! I like fat things." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 894

You deserved it 5 776

By Fatlady43 - 19/01/2010 05:08 - United States

Today, my niece offered me a slice of cake. After I refused, she asked, "Why not? Aren't fat people always hungry?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 283

You deserved it 6 521

MadaZer0 8

Thursday 11 February 2010 9:45

Hey at least your liked.

MermaidSongXOXO 6

Thursday 11 February 2010 9:48

That's why I like you around, too :) *Steals chicken wing from underneath OP's fat rolls.*

Comments

happybillie 0

Sunday 4 July 2010 18:45

that's awful!D:

Macromartyr 3

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:59

LMFAO op is blaaaaaaack

Kasevam 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 4:20

If you're squishy and always smell like fried chicken, it's probably because you eat a crapload of fried chicken. If not, I'd suggest going to a doctor.

fusebox 0

Friday 17 June 2011 19:12

* Muay Thai.

streetllama 4

Saturday 2 July 2011 1:09

Dat sounds like a fat black lady

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Thursday 1 December 2011 22:44

Normally I'd say FYL for being "squishy", but in this case YDI for smelling like fried chicken. Seriously, don't you bathe?

tatertot33 8

Friday 1 June 2012 16:06

R u black?

laya_fml 26

Thursday 31 January 2013 23:02

I thought this was mildly funny..... And then I saw it was from Georgia and thought it was hilarious. (Sorry to all you Georgians out there. I know I sound like an asshole.)