Love: Today, my boyfriend and I were gazing into each others' eyes...

By tjcl - 28/11/2009 06:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were gazing into each others' eyes in the moonlight after not having seen each other for a week. I thought he was going to say "I love you" and pull me in for a kiss. Instead, he said, "Since you can’t drive, we should get one of those two seater bicycles." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 306

You deserved it 9 463

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

BIKES!

By woxliuke - 05/05/2016 18:44 - Lithuania - Vilnius

Today, my boyfriend and I went for a ride on bicycles. After a while, I couldn't see him ahead of me any more. I went back and forth for half an hour but could't find him, and started to think something happened. I went home to call him but saw his bike. Turns out my boyfriend is just an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 296

You deserved it 1 582

Say it

By Her - 06/11/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years took me out to breakfast. We were eating and he kept on staring at me like he was thinking of something really important. I thought he was going to say, "I love you". So I told him to, "say it already." Turns out he was thinking of a way to dump me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 444

You deserved it 5 566

Jumping the gun

By Storm - 23/09/2011 03:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date to an expensive restaurant. After the meal, he got down on his knee and proposed. We've only been dating for two weeks, so I said no. He just silently kept staring me in the eyes, no matter what I said or did. I ended up having to walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 281

You deserved it 5 946

By Anon - 13/03/2016 00:13 - United States - San Antonio

Today, my boyfriend took me to dinner. As we waited for our food he took my hand and said, "I think we should break up." When I got outside, my tire was flat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 042

You deserved it 1 385

By Lifes_overated - 23/09/2009 14:10 - Australia

Today, at a bus stop my friend told me that he loved me. I, reacting on impulse, told him how long I've wanted to hear him say that, and kissed him. Then I realised the look on his face. Turns out he'd said 'I need new shoes' not 'I love you.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 058

You deserved it 48 755

By Lisa - 18/07/2014 20:21 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 115

You deserved it 7 376

By ditched?? - 06/08/2010 09:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 363

You deserved it 5 717

Never cross the streams

By caughttt - 10/02/2010 02:52 - United States

Today, I drove my ex-boyfriend home from dropping his car at the garage for new tires. On the way, I drove past my house where my boyfriend was sitting in the driveway ready to surprise me. My boyfriend watched us drive by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 258

You deserved it 43 681

Buffering

By Anonymous - 23/06/2021 13:59

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend. After telling him how much I loved him, he asked me to marry him. When I said yes and started crying, he said he wasn't sure if he really wants to get married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 111

By thunder thighs - 11/02/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 505

You deserved it 6 291

fakkumairaifu 14

Saturday 28 November 2009 12:12

What's the problem? That's still totally adorable. FYL for not appreciating a boyfriend who says such cute things.

heart604 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 12:09

movies have killed romance for you

Comments

rachel_parker 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 19:34

that's not bad that's cute and romantic :) at least he's honestt haha

rachel_parker 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 19:34

that's not bad that's cute and romantic :) at least he's honestt haha

n8equalsd 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 19:45

wow your life must really ******* suck. get over it, bitch.

Silentknight 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 20:43

oh my God!!! you didn't see each other for a whole f***ing week?!? that's like seven days, dude!! O_O I feel your pain. really.

Sigurjon 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 20:53

OH NO YOUR LIFE IS HORRIBLE YOU SHOULD COMMIT SUICIDE IMMEDIATELY.

scarlett29 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 21:06

This sounds like something that belongs on MLIA :)

Paneity 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 21:10

Hahahaha he's awesome! I'll have him if you don't want him?

DameGreyWulf 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 21:18

Wait, but, that's adorable. I don't get it...?

Skull_300 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 21:37

Her boyfriend will take a chain saw to the Mother ****** when they split up!!!

julay_fml 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 21:47

lol how in the heck is that an fml? honestly thats awesome

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, a slightly older guy friend of mine told me that he thinks of me as a little sister. Immediately afterwards, he tried to make out with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 77

Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 315

You deserved it 2 040

The Top

Today, my daughter turned one month old. I decided to give her a congratulatory kiss on the cheek. She decided to projectile vomit warm breastmilk into my partially open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 739

You deserved it 5 814

Today, I wanted to bake some chocolate chip cookies. As the first load was done, I tasted a cookie and it tasted too salty. Thinking it was because of the pinch of salt, I added more sugar to the batter, only to realize that the sugar I've put into the whole batter was actually salt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 2 432

Today, I went to the blood bank to donate plasma. All went well until the machine went to return my red blood cells. It turns out the nurse sliced my vein and the blood built up in my tissues. I now have a massive swollen arm and bruising, and look like a junkie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 434

You deserved it 2 636

Today, I found my expensive lingerie I thought I had lost. In my 15-year-old brother's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 650

You deserved it 2 231

Today, my mom found out that I got a tattoo two years ago. She got mad and spanked me. I'm 33 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 501

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking through an old photo album of mine. I turned to a page with a picture of me on my last day of college. I thought the picture was quite nice. He turned to me and said, "Don't worry, I take bad pictures too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 502

You deserved it 3 490