Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest...

By Taylor - 21/04/2014 04:04 - United States - Dubuque

Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 352

You deserved it 8 189

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Rosie - 13/06/2012 16:07 - Germany - Wesel

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 383

You deserved it 5 246

By Skullie - 19/02/2012 05:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 838

You deserved it 4 965

TMI, dude

By linren - 28/03/2009 18:40 - United States

Today, I was riding in the car with my new boyfriend. He had "something serious" to tell me. He started to emotionally confess his addiction to masturbation. In detail. The drive was two hours long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 310

You deserved it 7 649

By Anonymous - 04/11/2009 21:42 - United States

Today, I drove three and a half hours to surprise my long distance boyfriend for our anniversary. He was out of town. Where was he? Three and a half hours away trying to surprise me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 635

You deserved it 8 167

Nice try

By bonzo - 22/06/2015 14:41 - Australia - Perth

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after I drove two hours to his house, because he wanted to do it face to face. Then told me that if I wanted, we could have sex one last time, but I would have to leave right after, otherwise it would be weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 955

You deserved it 2 709

Needs

By Short end of the stick - 18/06/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, my long-distance boyfriend announced he’s sleeping with someone else and he can’t take the distance anymore. I literally drive 12 hours to see him every weekend. I just took a week off to spend time up there with him. So basically he can’t go 5 regular days of the week without sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 164

Quickie

By wasntworththedrive - 20/01/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 737

You deserved it 4 921

By anne - 17/12/2011 03:46 - United States

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 862

You deserved it 6 011

Is that it?

By Better not - 24/01/2018 20:00 - United States - Kenai

Today, while on vacation with my boyfriend, I decided it would be a good time to try getting intimate with him for the first time. It turns out his penis is so small that I get more enjoyment from a tampon applicator. We're stuck in this cabin for another five days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 280

You deserved it 2 389

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 16/08/2023 04:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he "couldn't handle the distance." He said he "couldn't commit to driving to see me long term." We live two hours apart, and I've driven to him every time; he never tried to come to me once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 147

graceinsheepwear 33

Monday 21 April 2014 16:20

Dick move.

Nmaredia 4

Monday 21 April 2014 16:18

At least you saw some action

Comments

shine999 12

Monday 21 April 2014 20:27

You've a very genius bf! Congrats!

hurryHM 10

Monday 21 April 2014 20:32

i could have done better than that

EndOfSekrets 13

Monday 21 April 2014 20:32

Am I the only one that thinks 20 miles is not that far?

DanielleinDC 33

Monday 21 April 2014 20:42

Nope. And her boyfriend's an idiot for driving 20 miles to show how he can use his penis to work his iPhone. Had OP driven 20 miles to watch him do that, it would have sucked. That said, I don't get it. Did the boyfriend come over, show off his trick, and then leave? Why didn't OP initiate something?

Axel5238 29

Monday 21 April 2014 21:57

I gonna guess that he so amazed by his trick that it killed enthusiasm at some point if she did try to he stopped to to show her the trick again. I know sometimes people say guys well take the initiative though I"m sure to some she should have made the move . I'm guessing that the OP was hoping for something that was a little romantic that showed some effort on the guys part? Not just driving out to wipe his dick on his phone.