Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend showed me how he gives himself a semi-erection...

By 4fucksake - 18/07/2010 23:26 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend showed me how he gives himself a semi-erection before he goes into the men's showers after training so his penis will look bigger in front of all the guys. I find it worrying that he won't have sex with me, but has no problem walking around in front of men naked with a semi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 398

You deserved it 4 698

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Same thing different taste

By dickofbrokendreams - 02/03/2015 05:14 - United States - Waynesville

Today, I discovered that my fiancé consistently thinks about his fear of breaking his penis while we have sex. He's afraid to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 022

You deserved it 3 479

By bathtime - 21/12/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 941

You deserved it 4 210

Not fair

By Anonymous - 03/11/2021 17:00

Today, my boyfriend is quite capable of getting an erection. He gets one when we watch porn, when I talk dirty to him and do handjobs or blowjobs, but the moment I get naked for the main event, he goes as soft as a boiled noodle. I haven’t been properly shagged in 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 247

You deserved it 324

Fetishes come in all sizes

By unboned - 11/05/2016 17:30 - United States - Katy

Today, my boyfriend got a raging boner while looking around at a gun store. He hasn't had any sexual interest in me in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 603

You deserved it 2 833

By peniswoman - 14/07/2013 17:03 - United Kingdom - Paisley

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 035

You deserved it 18 337

By anon. - 17/01/2012 23:41 - United States

Today, I found out if I refuse my boyfriend anything in public, he will continually yell out, "Penis!" until he gets his way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 156

You deserved it 8 786

No kinkshaming, but…

By Anonymous - 04/12/2018 15:00 - United States - Saint Joseph

Today, I realized that my husband's preferred sexual activities not only don't require me to take off my clothes, but go much better for him when I don't. He doesn't get why this makes me self-conscious about getting naked in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 241

You deserved it 446

By Anonymous - 22/03/2013 23:21 - Canada - Oakville

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 410

You deserved it 19 275

Unsanitary

By Anonymous - 01/06/2020 14:00

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 084

You deserved it 343

Libido

By Jena - 05/08/2022 01:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 233

You deserved it 334

Earths_Venus 25

Monday 19 July 2010 9:11

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

smokergirl420 0

Monday 19 July 2010 9:09

there's something wrong with that boy >.>

Comments

hales1919 3

Monday 19 July 2010 11:21

hahaha I love that he told you this

shine_lika_boss 0

Monday 19 July 2010 11:32

gay

paralyzingsilenc 0

Monday 19 July 2010 11:40

he could just take a shower when he gets home...unless he likes showing his semi around men then I'd say fyl

allplayedout 20

Monday 19 July 2010 12:11

your boyfriend is about to become your gay friend...just stating the obvious

DjeePee 24

Monday 19 July 2010 12:29

1) he has a small penis 2) he thinks he has a small penis 3) he's gay 4) you're his first girlfriend and he wants to wait with sex That's all I can think off.

abstar 0

Monday 19 July 2010 15:43

5) He is frightened that if he has sec with OP she will realise his "semi" is actually him at full mast?

tinaletto 0

Monday 19 July 2010 12:39

and why won't he have sex with you ?? let's check out gay meter lol

xXxbiancaxXx 0

Monday 19 July 2010 13:40

I have absolutley no comment on that... except ya I'd b worried too

owo_fml 9

Monday 19 July 2010 13:49

This could easily have been a "I don't know what's worse" FML! Since it wasn't, I'll give the OP an FYL instead of the YDI she deserves for being ugly(: