Miscellaneous: Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression,...

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 19:05 - United States - Brandon

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 729

You deserved it 4 658

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Brastro - 07/04/2009 11:46 - Ireland

Today, we were at the end of our surfing trip watching a photo montage. A picture popped up of an ugly girl surfing so I shouted out "I didn't know Shrek could surf". The room went very quiet. "Shrek" was sitting beside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 989

You deserved it 179 148

By tired individual - 12/01/2014 11:04 - United States - Dickson

Today, trying to get some much needed rest, I heard my neighbors fighting loudly. When they finally quit, they left a DVD on, directly behind my wall: Spongebob, with the menu tune on loop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 222

You deserved it 3 869

By Alpha - 17/12/2011 21:18 - Estonia

Today, while I was meditating in my room, I started to hear strange sounds. I was thrilled and thought I was having some sort of profound experience. It turned out my brother had tuned in to South Park out in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 542

You deserved it 31 789

By Kenton - 15/06/2019 00:14

Today, my older brother called me in the middle of the night to describe to me, in painstaking elaborate detail, the Yamaha commercial he'd just watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 594

You deserved it 175

By whyarewerelated - 08/09/2011 15:41 - United Kingdom

Today, I was working alone in the office with my brother. He's run out of work to do, so has been singing Disney songs loudly and badly, throwing stationery at me, and just now snuck up on me from behind and wrapped duct tape round my face. It's just us in the office next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 095

You deserved it 2 864

By Anonymous - 14/01/2010 21:56 - United States

Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 354

You deserved it 3 822

Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

By EarScentedCandle - 27/05/2018 09:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, after watching Shrek, my little brother started collecting his earwax to make it into a candle like Shrek did. I can’t get him to throw it away even after bribing him with bags of candy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 205

You deserved it 337

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 11:45 - Australia

Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 324

You deserved it 5 601

By riiiighhhttttt - 05/08/2013 05:38 - United States - Laurel

Today, I actually had to explain to my sister that Shrek was not in fact based on a true story. She replied that I'm a "clueless twat". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 701

You deserved it 4 349

By JackieD - 25/08/2014 18:05 - United States - Bellevue

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 100

You deserved it 16 223

jainam 7

Sunday 8 March 2015 13:09

Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

feven 32

Sunday 8 March 2015 13:04

Maybe Shrek is trying to tell you something

Comments

teentee401 36

Sunday 8 March 2015 14:46

Better check yourself before you Shrek yourself...

TheGatekeeper43 8

Sunday 8 March 2015 14:56

It was meant to be

sprout_08 12

Sunday 8 March 2015 14:59

Haha

ARetardedSeal 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 15:04

Did he whisper into your ear saying "this is my swamp"

AliLikesApples 14

Wednesday 11 March 2015 1:51

No, but he kept screaming "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP!!!!"

friedpwnadge 25

Sunday 8 March 2015 15:09

hahahahahahahhahaha your life sucks op

NeoMatrix25 12

Sunday 8 March 2015 15:40

I'm gonna guess Shawshank Redemption. I seem to recall a big green ogre in that movie.

ShadowlessSpear 21

Sunday 8 March 2015 16:18

He'd do it for Shrek.

ThatDamHuntress 20

Sunday 8 March 2015 16:20

At least it wasn't Sherk ****.

150493x 29

Sunday 8 March 2015 17:18

You beat me to it. Damn.

Steve95401 49

Sunday 8 March 2015 17:26

Or My Little Pony ****.

Aspyr 10

Sunday 8 March 2015 16:56

I watched the ending of that movie last night

Cebolamole 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 17:28

It's never ogre.

Keywords

Embarrassing Miscellaneous Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 341

You deserved it 403

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 95

The Top

Today, I snuck downstairs to watch a midnight movie. One moment I'm trying to plug my headphones in, in the dark, and the next my dad's beating the shit out of me with a baseball bat. Turns out he snuck down after me for a midnight snack and thought I was a burglar disconnecting the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 189

You deserved it 5 303

Today, I still don’t know how to act in front of my mother in law. She thinks that the Earth is flat and told her kids that all sunscreens cause cancer. She also has other theories that make me feel weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 815

You deserved it 127

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 311

You deserved it 16 543

Today, I went to my little cousin's school to pick her up and it happened to be my old elementary school. I saw my old teacher and went up to say hi, and after a few minutes she goes "Aren't you the girl who's dad always came in drunk on parent's day?" Nice to know that's how I'm remembered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 417

You deserved it 2 768

Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 945

You deserved it 4 518

Today, I was talking to my mom about my younger brother getting his girlfriend pregnant. She asked me how old I was when I first had sex. I'm a 21 year-old virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 278

You deserved it 5 607

Same thing different taste

Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

Top comments

Comments