Love: Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and...

By Anonymous - 23/07/2011 23:53 - United States

Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 949

You deserved it 99 305

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Same thing different taste

Waiting for that special someone

By foreveralone - 10/07/2020 17:04

Today, just like at every gynecologist's appointment in the last 5 years, I had to yet again explain that no, I'm not a virgin at 27 because I'm waiting till marriage, I'm just a loser that no-one wants to sleep with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 680

You deserved it 221

By Brook - 26/02/2013 08:21 - Australia - Sydney

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 456

You deserved it 3 823

Relatable, unfortunately

By Anonymous - 30/12/2020 13:58 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I realized that I'm at the age that whenever I mention a friend of the opposite gender, my family's first response is asking whether that friend is single. I've already accepted no one will want a pathetic freak like me, so their poking around what few friends I have makes it awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 145

By likesboys - 19/05/2010 12:00 - Canada

Today, my entire family thinks I'm a lesbian. I'm straight. I'm embarrassed and don't know how to tell them that I've been single for so long because I can't get a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 951

You deserved it 4 970

By uhoh.. - 22/03/2015 19:51 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, a girl was making fun of me for being a virgin and, "never seeing a nipple". I have three. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 409

You deserved it 3 009

By okeythen - 30/06/2013 05:03 - United States - Orlando

Today, I heard my husband telling his friend that I used to be a skank and was "easier than 1 plus 1" when we first met. I was still a virgin when we got married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 279

You deserved it 3 946

The truth will set you free

By Imnotfromhere - 29/08/2021 23:01

Today, I told my mom I was with my female friend last night, because I wasn't ready to tell her about my new boyfriend. I didn't realize he gave me a hickey and now my whole family thinks I'm a lesbian. They won't stop making fun of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 1 023

By Anonymous - 03/08/2012 22:50 - Mexico - Villahermosa

Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 036

You deserved it 1 951

By Anonymous - 17/06/2013 05:54 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 339

You deserved it 11 261

By Just_do_it_17 - 09/05/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 013

You deserved it 8 071

lovelikewoe 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 2:27

well, it's obviously your fault because you constantly lied.

cheesenuggrt 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 2:27

YDI for lying. Also I'm a cocksucker.

Comments

jazzybaby179 22

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:22

you totally deserve that dumbass

BAVFDFirefighter 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:27

ydi for braggin bout crap you didn't do... that's why you tell the truth... then you ain't screwin nothin up retard

chippa 24

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:28

I hate to say it, but... your life is, indeed, not ******.

masterskywalker 2

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:32

Dont brag next time bro. problem solved.YDI

kingscoob 1

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:36

i feel ur pain on that!

syk900 3

Sunday 24 July 2011 5:40

no one likes a bragger

Mxpxdude189 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:13

that's what you get for being a douche

sandybaybe 3

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:20

ydi bigtime..

dolphingirl00 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:22

that's what you get for lying dummy!

Calibobaliee 1

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:22

Name and age ;) lol jkjk! That sux!

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The Top

Today, a woman came through my drive-thru and ordered a latte, but the bank had closed off her cards and she was short 30 cents in cash. I felt bad, so I paid for her. When I went home, I told my dad what I did, thinking he'd be proud of how he raised me but no, he said I'd wasted my money, and made me feel bad about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 105

Today, a VIP visited our building. I was put in charge of his hospitality and was very nervous. At one point, he asked me if he could, “Ahem… wash my hands.” Without thinking, I took him to our kitchen so he could use the sink. Turns out he needed a pee. He looked at me like I was an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 177

The Top

Today, I had a conversation with a girl on Tinder, for the third time this month. Just like the other two girls, she turned out to be a prostitute. Only prostitutes will give me the time of day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 193

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 406

You deserved it 26 445

Today, I put "Jesus Christ" as a reference on an application, because all the fields needed to be filled in order for the submission to go through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 450

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 339

You deserved it 4 397

Today, I realized my boyfriend is a little too much like my ex, who passed away 6 years ago. Some days, it's as if I'm dating his personality doppleganger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 291

You deserved it 301

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 892

You deserved it 3 409

Same thing different taste

Waiting for that special someone

Relatable, unfortunately

The truth will set you free

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