Miscellaneous: Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML - FML

By paige - 01/04/2011 03:18 - United States

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 728

You deserved it 5 789

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Same thing different taste

He's still got it

By Anonymous - 26/10/2019 00:01

Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 706

You deserved it 151

By Illinoisgirl - 14/02/2012 14:29 - Hungary

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 242

You deserved it 3 050

By sober - 12/02/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 392

You deserved it 4 328

By Anonymous - 15/05/2015 23:55 - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 747

You deserved it 2 382

By ItGirl - 09/11/2014 02:36 - Sweden - Eskilstuna

Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 527

You deserved it 3 367

Anger management

By FML - 08/12/2013 18:00 - Puerto Rico - Cayey

Today, my dad came home drunk off his ass. So drunk that he couldn't manage to open the refrigerator, and ended up punching it in a fit of rage. When I tried to calm him down and get him to bed, he told me to fuck off, and grounded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 663

You deserved it 3 397

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 667

You deserved it 2 777

News to me

By Anonymous - 18/04/2020 20:00

Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 934

You deserved it 184

By Anonymous - 01/05/2015 20:02 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, a drunk man started yelling at the lamppost outside my house, demanding to be let inside, all while my neighbors watched. That man is my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 361

You deserved it 2 466

This is fine

By Anonymous - 07/08/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 86

Next

Top comments

enonymous 8

Friday 1 April 2011 12:24

There is nothing wrong with admiring what you've created... I know I do every time I take a dump... unless it's one of those damned automatic flushing toilets...

matt1990 0

Friday 1 April 2011 12:01

at least he didnt call u ugly. stop bein debby downer.

Comments

Real1 0

Friday 1 April 2011 15:24

maybe he was talking about your body temperature...NOT!...

You_Need_Soap 6

Friday 1 April 2011 15:25

What goes on in wincest stays in wincest. Duh, WINNING!

scottishandrew1 0

Friday 1 April 2011 15:38

so..... did you guys do it, or what??

j_cat187 19

Friday 1 April 2011 15:57

people say crazy things when their drunk

Phelep85 0

Friday 1 April 2011 16:03

Sexual Harassment Panda

amyyw 0

Friday 1 April 2011 16:42

hahaha best one^!

ecsweet 0

Friday 1 April 2011 16:08

well if this were to happen to me id would've probably been freaked...

JBS101 0

Friday 1 April 2011 16:10

run!!!!

mpclaw 3

Friday 1 April 2011 16:13

are you upset because you know your not hot?

Vulger 0

Friday 1 April 2011 16:16

"Beer Goggles" don't worry your not hot.

Ninabug28 5

Friday 1 April 2011 16:19

Congratulations!=]

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Coworkers Relatable Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 136

Today, making small talk with my coworkers, I said a restaurant I'd tried recently was "superb". They all gave me weird looks, and one said, "Someone's trying too hard to sound smart." Now I've got a rep as a pseudo-intellectual douchebag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 109

The Top

Today, I got a speeding ticket in the mail, at the same time as my car was getting towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 210

Today, I got told once again that I’m being a horrible mother by letting a man move in with me. We recently got engaged after 6 years together. Meanwhile, my ex has a new girlfriend practically every other month and forced our kids to call multiple women “Mommy.” Yeah, I’m the bad guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 135

Today, my autistic dad asked while I was in the middle of giving birth if I could be quieter and to hurry up because he was four hours late for work. When I yelled at him, he faked one of his meltdowns so mom had to leave me to deal with him, even though it’s SUPER obvious when he’s faking. God I hate his guts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 199

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 745

You deserved it 6 397

Today, I found out how hard a lemon is to the nuts when being hurled by an angry girlfriend for losing at Wii Sports. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 558

You deserved it 5 063

Today, my soon-to-be husband showed up with an animal print suit at our engagement ceremony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 261

You deserved it 1 657