Money: Today, my dad told me he has money set aside for when he has...

By Anonymous - 12/06/2011 19:21 - United States

Today, my dad told me he has money set aside for when he has to bail me out of jail, because "it's bound to happen sooner or later." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 645

You deserved it 10 765

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By No one special. - 12/12/2010 05:28 - United States

Today, my dad called for the first time in six months. He needs someone to bail him out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 495

You deserved it 2 433

By fox_at_heart - 30/09/2016 02:21 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I found out my father has been saving money to help me buy my first car. In the same conversation, I found out my mother, unbeknownst to my dad, used nearly all of the money to bail my drunken, deadbeat uncle out of jail for the fourth time a month ago. He's now back in prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 909

You deserved it 778

By Username - 23/06/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I found out that my dad has been trying to take money out of my savings account to pay for divorce fees and a hammock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 366

You deserved it 2 603

By that was mine - 15/05/2015 22:26 - United States - Cherry Hill

Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 893

You deserved it 2 349

By MadSon - 11/10/2009 02:59 - United States

Today, my dad had something to tell me. He'd cleaned out my bank account to pay off 38,000 dollars worth of gambling debt. My wedding is in 5 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 033

You deserved it 4 118

By needofmoney - 18/02/2011 02:16 - United States

Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 664

You deserved it 5 085

By chiktikka - 14/01/2014 22:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad asked me to lend him some money to buy his medication, since he's all but broke right now. He returned with nothing but a bottle of tequila. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 124

You deserved it 8 418

Free money for me, but not for thee

By Anonymous - 04/08/2020 14:01

Today, my dad refuses to let me inherit all of his money, which might just put a roof over my head when I’m older. *His* money? Well, actually, he inherited it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 229

You deserved it 931

By FATS DOMINO - 20/10/2011 15:39 - United States

Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 607

You deserved it 2 448

By ~__~ - 20/03/2015 21:23

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 657

You deserved it 2 462

melissamoshh 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:27

How thoughtful

whiskuit 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:34

Now there's something you can't call a... *puts on sunglasses* ...trust fund. YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH

Comments

smallory42 0

Monday 13 June 2011 2:54

Thats nice of him.

bewbies 3

Monday 13 June 2011 2:55

live up to his expectations then.

tieu2arock 3

Monday 13 June 2011 2:55

well, be happy he cares.

JustKeepOnHatin 7

Monday 13 June 2011 3:01

your kinda lucky, if I got put in jail my daddy would make me stay and learn my lesson :p

crzy4life 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:07

lol that's funny

limepinklis 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:19

well...is it?

Rainbow_dumpster 28

Monday 13 June 2011 3:32

At least he cares. :)

skikid 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:50

lucky!

alicecanitbe 0

Monday 13 June 2011 4:02

well u never no but, WHEN u prove him wrong make sure u still get the move, locked up or not :P

franticravyn 7

Monday 13 June 2011 4:07

Optimistic dad you have there.

Keywords

Love Cheating Awkward Jewelry Engagement ring Miscellaneous Shopping Technology Cute Kids Scary Pranks Underwear Embarrassing Students College Life School Education Ironic Health Weddings Work Mental health Empathy Confused University Annoying AITA Sex Divorce

The Top

Today, the woman I am absolutely in love with will only be my friend. I wish I could get her to understand how much it hurts to see her with boyfriends, and only be friends. I'm starting to feel like I can't maintain this friendship because it hurts so much. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 743

Today, my boyfriend and I were using our Skype accounts for the first time. He went to the restroom and I thought that I'd surprise him with my clothes off for when he came back. I heard him walk back into the room so I got into position. It wasn't him. It was his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 652

You deserved it 25 000

The Top

Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 594

You deserved it 5 713

Today, I automated a task at work and a day-long procedure ran in a few hours. My boss was completely unimpressed because "I'm not paid to automate stuff, I'm paid to work". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 748

You deserved it 315

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 745

You deserved it 22 640

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 616

You deserved it 6 076

Today, my toddler realised that my pregnancy means I can't move easily anymore. He celebrated his freedom by doing everything he's not allowed to, and staying just outside my reach at all times. He loves his new game, and it looks like he's not going to stop anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 690

You deserved it 829

Today, completely nude, I had to collect my clothes around the boy’s apartment I have been sleeping with for awhile. While his girlfriend watched to make sure I “got the fuck out.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 305

You deserved it 181 017

Same thing different taste

Free money for me, but not for thee

Top comments

Comments