Miscellaneous: Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated...

By fuck you dad - 30/03/2013 18:17 - Ireland - Carrickmacross

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 510

You deserved it 55 564

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Same thing different taste

Catchphrase hell

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 22:56 - United States

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it was. He just paused, turned to look me in the eye, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 966

You deserved it 20 514

By Anonymous - 22/08/2014 18:41 - United States - Doylestown

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 117

You deserved it 42 998

By idonteven - 12/08/2013 20:04 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 029

You deserved it 4 486

Snapping

By Marquise - 11/07/2024 22:00 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, my boyfriend crossed a line with his bullshit "jokes". At dinner, he once again annoyed my dad by insisting that the "AR" in "AR-15" means "assault rifle". My dad is an NRA gun nut, so he finally blew up and told him that he was going to "AR his nuts if he didn't quit fucking with him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 474

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 15:44 - United States

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 575

You deserved it 2 557

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 574

You deserved it 3 374

By rowie1311 - 27/03/2011 18:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 583

You deserved it 31 058

By Anonymous - 14/07/2013 19:37 - Brazil - Campinas

Today, while mourning my friend's recent passing, my dad told me to shut the fuck up because "worse things are going on in the world". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 777

You deserved it 4 659

By Anonymous - 23/07/2016 23:04 - United States - Atlanta

Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 869

You deserved it 19 265

What?

By Fuck you dad - 16/09/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, whenever my dad says something and I (genuinely) don't hear him, he repeats it in an extremely slow and condescending manner. My family says I should "get a sense of humor" because I'm rightfully pissed about this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 149

cherries62212 16

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:43

well... that escalated quickly...

JellyBalls 18

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:45

Respect your parents.

Comments

perdix 29

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:04

You'd probably have blown a gasket if your dad fired back a quick YOLO.

advent2060 4

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:05

Lol u jus got trolled by your dad YDI for sure

Jharrist89 12

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:11

Damn.. You ate that Shit! Num Num nums

Shadow_Phantom 26

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:20

it's kind of sad how people will become repetitive zombies for the sake of memes...

FightMyLiger 19

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:23

Where's the YDFDI button when you need it.

MarissaCristina 13

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:27

YDI. 1) you disrespected your dad by telling him to shut up already. I would've paid for that. And 2) you walked right into that one.

jesellen23 7

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:33

Just be happy you still have a dad. One day you'll look back on this and smile.

0ops_i_died 8

Sunday 31 March 2013 6:53

That would've earned me a a good whoopin'... I don't think I ever had the nerve to tell either of my parents to shut up

mosiz 3

Sunday 31 March 2013 7:23

You're dad is a boss.

xxaerofox 4

Sunday 31 March 2013 7:24

Have some humor OP.

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The Top

Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 712

You deserved it 11 210

Today, my friend invited me to an afro-indigenous event. Eager to learn more about my roots, I tagged along. The bean bag toss and warrior dance was fun, until the Q&A came and it was clear that the focus wasn't the African diaspora but "consistent ritualized self-improvement." Yup, it's a cult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 211

You deserved it 484

The Top

Today, a lady came into my workplace to pay her $120 bill in one dollar bills. I kept losing count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 832

You deserved it 12 643

Today, I asked my husband what he wanted for his birthday, hinting that he could have anything sexual, and he asked me to… take the kids and visit my mother over the weekend, so he could have 48 hours totally alone, naked, drinking beer, and playing his Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 179

You deserved it 949

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 015

You deserved it 6 024

Today, I woke up feeling extremely nauseous. When I started to feel better, I felt like I needed to spit. I went into the bathroom and opened the toilet to see someone had taken a giant crap the night before and forgotten to flush. The smell made me vomit all over my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 681

You deserved it 3 442

Today, my boyfriend and I were roleplaying therapist and patient in bed. When I playfully asked him what bothered him, he told me his mother hates him and burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 551

You deserved it 6 335

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 025

You deserved it 5 277