Animals: Today, my docile gerbil was startled by a car alarm. He dove... - FML

By piercednipple - 30/06/2015 16:02 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, my docile gerbil was startled by a car alarm. He dove into my tank top and bit straight through my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 067

You deserved it 2 760

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Same thing different taste

Kinky Crab

By Robert Herrin - 14/08/2018 18:30

Today, I fell asleep with my hermit crab on my bed and woke up to him pinching my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 012

You deserved it 2 131

By No Nip - 25/04/2019 12:00

Today, I was making breakfast with my parrot on my shoulder. He was excited about the food, and in his rush to climb down to the counter, bit through my nipple. I had to get stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 986

You deserved it 486

Carly Rae Jepsen

By Anonymous - 14/07/2024 23:00

Today, I was setting up a rat trap at the kitchen table and had just gotten it set when my phone rang. I foolishly leaned over to grab my phone, brushed against the trap, and it snapped closed on my nipple. I wasn’t wearing a bra so that thing grabbed my nipple hard and didn’t let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 246

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 164

By MikeNick - 17/12/2011 07:59 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 710

You deserved it 9 797

Red or grey?

By Cherry - 11/02/2023 02:00

Today, I tried to take a selfie with a squirrel and it bit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 1 376

By Luna - 22/07/2012 02:30 - United States - Carmel

Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 693

You deserved it 3 530

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 253

You deserved it 5 275

By cdn_steed - 23/04/2011 13:11 - United States

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 972

You deserved it 4 661

By corasmom - 27/07/2011 18:09 - United States

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 874

You deserved it 10 542

Next

Top comments

jimmer23 21

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:23

My nipples hurt from all the way over here.

sarah5745 41

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:20

Holy shit!

Comments

Emmamazing 26

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:45

Hey, free nipple piercing! You just gotta look on the bright side

coraline123c 23

Thursday 2 July 2015 5:13

Someone already made that joke

raesos91 26

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:50

was it lefty or righty?

Ichiya 29

Wednesday 1 July 2015 6:35

It was actually her nubin (third nipple) and she rather enjoyed it.

nikki465 14

Wednesday 1 July 2015 10:38

That made me cringe...

trey600rr 22

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:56

guess your not into that kind of stuff huh...lol

KatPlaysMC 14

Wednesday 1 July 2015 3:31

*you're

writerchic85 25

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:58

A great adventure is waiting for you ahead...

sandman676 20

Wednesday 1 July 2015 0:59

Kinky

daddysgirl243 21

Wednesday 1 July 2015 1:11

that sounds kinky

chuka81 27

Wednesday 1 July 2015 1:17

A pet rat. Wonderful.

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 1 July 2015 6:34

Gerbil...not rat 23

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Friday 10 July 2015 14:53

And pet rats actually are wonderful anyway. ;) They're not disease ridden or pests like most people think. They're very sweet animals that clean themselves like cats and play with you and can learn tricks like dogs.

pajamajeans 18

Wednesday 1 July 2015 1:26

I have a gerbil bite scar on my finger. I can only imagine the pain that op is feeling.

91hayek 31

Wednesday 1 July 2015 1:39

Some girls wouldn't call this an FML. In fact they'd buy several gerbils and install car alarms everywhere.

Miss_Syntax 15

Wednesday 1 July 2015 1:46

Poor little guy. I'm sure he didn't mean it!

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 36 855

You deserved it 4 564

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The Top

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You deserved it 5 763

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I agree, your life sucks 1 045

You deserved it 127

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I agree, your life sucks 3 887

You deserved it 6 260

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 057

Today, I took a two-hour bus ride to get to orientation, got stuck a block away because the pedestrian sidewalk was closed, waited half-an-hour for my ride in the rain, when someone called the cops on me for acting suspicious. I got to the interview soaking wet, and they told me they'd rescheduled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 874

You deserved it 1 340

Today, I was running late and rushing to a waiting bus. I made it to the doors just as they closed. I knocked desperately, hoping the driver would let me in. He hovered his hand over the button for a few seconds, then flipped me off, and drove away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 956

You deserved it 3 842