Miscellaneous: Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my... - FML

By unfortunate - 30/06/2013 04:45 - United States

Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 150

You deserved it 3 195

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By Anonymous - 16/11/2009 00:52 - Canada

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 130

You deserved it 4 187

By crakbbyaparently - 31/01/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 839

You deserved it 1 891

By Anonymous - 11/05/2011 17:32 - Canada

Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 141

You deserved it 4 221

By verycre8tive - 21/05/2009 07:31 - Romania

Today, after a few drinks my dad decided to tell me the story of how I was born. He wanted a baby girl after my brother, and mum didn't want any more children. So he tricked her by giving her the wrong pill. That should explain a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 628

You deserved it 2 728

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 07:26 - United States - Blair

Today, I found out that the only reason I'm alive is because my dad beat the living shit out of my mom to stop her getting an abortion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 293

You deserved it 1 896

Busted

By Anonymous - 25/03/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up, she would take me to get birth control. Wanting birth control, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 701

You deserved it 28 883

By hail - 27/12/2018 20:00

Today, I told my parents I was pregnant but don’t know who the Dad is. My Mom said “that’s alright, I still don’t know who your dad is”. So apparently my father isn’t my real Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 868

You deserved it 1 205

By my honest father - 10/07/2013 16:33 - United States - Kansas City

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 063

You deserved it 3 748

Thanks for sharing your inspiring story, Dad

By Anonymous - 16/02/2024 23:00

Today, my dad told me quite bluntly that, while he loved me, he never planned to have me. My mom baby-trapped him by sabotaging their birth control methods, and my existence ruined his life irrevocably and caused the functional alcoholism he has suffered with for 40 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 112

By ellabellabooboo - 22/03/2015 02:27 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I mentioned to my mum that one of my friends is pregnant. She decided I was lying, that I'm the one who's actually pregnant, and that I'm going to get checked out by a doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 283

You deserved it 2 681

Next

Top comments

naxeeb 33

Sunday 30 June 2013 16:09

I don't know why he found the need to tell you that. My condolences OP :(

abcdog123 16

Sunday 30 June 2013 16:13

Atleast you know your mom really wanted to have you. Some people are complete accidents in both sides :p

Comments

biscuitninja 4

Monday 1 July 2013 15:55

As a twin, one of us wasn't planned, but now, none of the family can ever really think of us as a "mistake". We are very loved.

SirWTF 10

Monday 1 July 2013 16:11

My parents had some pretty dumb reason for me being born as well. F all our lives.

person123123 1

Monday 1 July 2013 17:03

The exact same thing happened to me and my twin brother :(

nitrog100 21

Monday 1 July 2013 20:01

Same reason that I have a niece...

photogodess 13

Tuesday 2 July 2013 2:55

Yea I know the feeling, my sperm donor (father) told me he hated me, I was his biggest mistake, and I should have been someone else's kid! Thanks asshole dads everywhere

robynnobyn09 8

Thursday 4 July 2013 11:53

Nearly the same thing happened to me, except my mom informed my dad in front of me.

Sir_Swaggington 6

Saturday 6 July 2013 0:45

Maybe he's just trying to make you use condoms? My app doesn't show gender so I'm not sure.

kingvssj0 9

Wednesday 18 September 2013 0:33

There should be a your dad deserved it button

doglover100 28

Monday 28 October 2013 15:28

That was an unnecessary comment.

fiveforfighting 26

Tuesday 9 December 2014 14:45

Sorry about that OP! I found out the same thing years ago! Sneaky moms :)

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Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 63

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 23

The Top

Today, at physical therapy, I felt that all-too-familiar gurgle in my gut, but I thought it would a light, silent fart. I squatted for an exercise and shit my pants in front of the cute, single, male physical therapist. He definitely noticed. I still had 30 minutes left in the session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 813

You deserved it 659

Today, I found out that the small town I moved to to escape the crowds is actually a popular tourist spot in the summer. The majority are unbathed. I work in retail at the only convenience store, and the temperature has hit triple digits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 330

You deserved it 1 289

Today, I fell down the stairs while holding a cup of hot coffee. Now I have burns all over me and a twisted ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 409

You deserved it 100

Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 060

You deserved it 4 080

Today, after 6 months of my baby sleeping 10 hours through the night, she's now going through sleep regression a week before I return to work. I'm now getting about 3 hours of broken sleep per night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 158

Today, I completed a jigsaw puzzle. Almost. You see, there's a problem: One of the pieces is an exact duplicate of another, and the actual missing piece is… gone. So there's one empty space and one piece that doesn't fit. Words cannot describe how irrationally angry this makes me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 142