Love: Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one...

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 18:27 - United States

Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 766

You deserved it 3 624

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Overbearing girlfriend

By Jake - 16/09/2013 19:08 - United States - Albany

Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 474

You deserved it 8 259

Weird timing

By Anonymous - 17/02/2013 22:44 - Hungary - Szeged

Today, while at church, I received a text from my girlfriend, saying, "It's not working. We're over." Not only was my phone not on silent mode, I was sitting directly beside my now ex-girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 920

You deserved it 4 522

What do you want from me?

By Anonymous - 16/09/2023 22:00

Today, after weeks of my girlfriend moaning that I never go anywhere, I went out with some friends. An hour in, she started blowing up my phone. When I answered it, she was screaming in rage because I wasn't home to cook dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 155

By hopeless - 14/02/2015 20:04 - Canada - Halifax

Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 757

You deserved it 2 891

By anonymous - 22/11/2009 20:23 - United States

Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 668

You deserved it 2 990

Watch your step

By the guy that didn't get his kiss - 25/06/2021 16:01

Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 149

By thedudeman14 - 05/11/2014 22:21 - United States - Deer Park

Today, my phone died while I was on the phone with my girlfriend. When I finally got a charger, I saw a text message from her. I'm now single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 461

You deserved it 3 193

Don't answer

By Anonymous - 10/11/2014 14:28 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 605

You deserved it 5 816

By Autocorrected - 04/03/2012 05:02 - Philippines

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 676

You deserved it 31 441

By Anonymous - 28/03/2009 20:18 - United States

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524 616

You deserved it 37 040

zOMGitsdc 0

Friday 11 September 2009 23:23

Hope your dumb girlfriend realized she made herself look retarded doing that.

genius_man16 0

Friday 11 September 2009 23:23

What a cheating bitch! But hey, be glad you're rid of her.

Comments

Guairdean 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 6:06

Change the locks.

lbanks_fml 10

Saturday 12 September 2009 6:17

I just got 1 question==Did she come back Silly ????

ninja4life 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 6:31

i can under stand why she left if it came from you. maybe you shouldnt push her away.

Bunny1313 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 6:51

I feel your pain!! my man is married and it hurts every time she calls or texts. he is gonna leave but hasn't yet. when u in love with someone it hurts what they do to u!! n seems like everyone cheats now!!

atty11 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:21

@bunny1313 i'm judging you for seeing a married man, you homewrecking ****, you...

GriefBacon 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:41

I'm going to go ahead and say this is fake. #95 you should really try to develop your sense of humor. And if I am wrong....OMG ****! ;p

atty11 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:54

i do have a sense of humor, it's just slightly different from what you would expect lol

Rijii 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:58

Wow. A **** and a retard in one! Your girlfriend sure is a winner. FYL, but YDI if you don't break up with the loose ***** after that.

namezox 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 9:47

keep her for the XXX.

friscobuff 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 12:01

YDI for being your slutty girlfriend's copycat!

Mr_Eated 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 13:51

Why isn't she your ex-girlfriend now? Even if she's not banging someone else, if my girl had guy "friends" who sent those kinds of messages, we're done! That's a load of crap dude.

Hazy_fml 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 14:18

Ah the classic double standard. Perfectly fine if she cheats, but god forbid you do. And to make this clear, even though you have never cheated, she is going to make herself look good and flee the scene. *Note: I do not condone, nor endorse cheating. Be faithful, dammit!