By Anonymous - 11/04/2009 15:47 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML
I agree, your life sucks 69 034
You deserved it 21 543

Same thing different taste

Top comments

TheZman 0

You should have proceded to take a needle and pop those bitches

Well if she dumps you, say "Hmm isnt the left one slightly bigger?" No matter who tells her they are fine, it will still eat away at her :)

Comments

dump the bitch!!! what a cow saying that!! hope she gets cancer....... ne way what kind of a thick person would want breast implants xD

tiltwrestler 0

*laughs* "Baby, you already did- do you really think that any average joe can pay for breast implants? I make good money. And besides... if you couldn't do better than me before, do you really think that hard lumpy fake **** are gonna make a difference? The only reason I even got them was because you were so persistent on getting them- most guys don't prefer them, and I don't either. And let's face it- you're slutty and shallow, and im the manwhore who was dumb enough to buy them for your ungrateful butt. We're clearly meant for each other!" Then whip the one-eyed snake out and dickwhip her... teach that hoe a lesson! gotta be put back IN HER PLACE!

#11 is right. Also, word to the wise: 'fake ****' are (usually!) a big ****-off warning sign.

When will men learn? Never pay for a woman's implants!

haha i'd take those implants back if i were you.. golddiggaaaa.

Mylife_cant_suck 0

lol... she must feel confident in here own body! God sue america!

You should punch both of her boobs when you get the chance and give em permanent damage so they'll all be lopsided when they heal :). But make it seem like an accident (like trip her while she's going down the stairs or some shit), so you won't get canned by the police.

Stop short enough to make her head hit the dash and then go back and leave her at the hospital.

Kyothine 0

I agree with one of the previous posters, except: piss her off and when she dumps you say "I knew this would happen, so I asked the surgeon to make the left side smaller."