Money: Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting...

By Anonymous - 11/04/2009 15:47 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 034

You deserved it 21 542

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Same thing different taste

By FML - 05/07/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 059

You deserved it 4 627

Body positivity

By Anonymous - 18/01/2024 09:00 - Switzerland

Today, when I was a teen, I felt inferior for being flat-chested. So I got a boob job. As an adult, I started yoga and meditation. Then I felt foolish for not embracing my natural self and having plastic stuff in me. Got the implants out. Now I'm happy with my looks but have nerve damage from the procedures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 459

By TheAngryBird - 28/06/2012 04:51 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 413

You deserved it 2 715

You what?

By whattheheck - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 614

You deserved it 3 566

You helped her see the light

By losercancer - 23/04/2021 23:30 - Georgia

Today, my girlfriend left me, saying she'd started to appreciate herself more with the help of a therapist. That I paid for her to visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 215

By AngryBirdman - 22/04/2011 05:53

Today, my girlfriend told me she is only going out with me because I look like the person she really wants to go out with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 278

You deserved it 3 707

By Voice29 - 26/03/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, I bought my girlfriend two tickets to a Broadway show that was coming through town she really wanted to see. I couldn't attend with her due to work so she said she would take her mom. I found out later she took her ex. Now they're back together, and I paid for the date that made it happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 180 036

You deserved it 24 835

By sigh - 24/01/2009 01:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend showed his mother photos of me. He told her that he thinks I'm pretty. She said that I look like a celebrity from her country (Korea). Flattered, I online searched this celebrity, and turns out she is a local porn star who's undergone multiple cosmetic surgeries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 679

You deserved it 2 525

By Anonymous - 16/10/2010 04:17 - United States

Today, my perfectly sane and healthy 90 year old grandmother had a heart to heart with me. She told me she'd pay for a boob job. When I asked why, she said, "Sweetie, you'll never attract someone with those tiny suckers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 715

You deserved it 4 022

Fate

By D-Man - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend got engaged to a coworker. I got her the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 4 208

TheZman 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:32

You should have proceded to take a needle and pop those bitches

Nitros_fml 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:42

Well if she dumps you, say "Hmm isnt the left one slightly bigger?" No matter who tells her they are fine, it will still eat away at her :)

Comments

imlaughingatyou 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:45

HOE, lol.

Aristai 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:46

Real boobs are always better than fake, no matter the size...

Libbyy 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:44

Ah, there was a comment a second ago saying mention one looks slightly bigger, and I would go with that. They were right, it would eat away at her.

tWitt3rBuG 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:45

FHL! Run!!! Sorry dude! But she's fake, time for you to get a real gf! Like hello how many guys do you think would love her for her (like you!) She'll be back. Hope you moved on by then! She doesn't deserve you man!

AkihiroHattori5 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:54

I would've dumped her on the spot, then sued her for the expenses.

fatalscape 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 22:54

she didnt leave you did she? She probably said that knowing you werent going anywhere and its not like you can get a refund. hope you two have been going out for a while to make it worth it or maybe you have money blow like that. good luck.

eastsidehippie 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 23:10

Yeah but eww, fake breasts?

nobody_special 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 23:13

That's horrible for her to make such a comment like that. Respond with "Maybe I can find a girl with real breasts!" and the "one looks slightly bigger on you" comment.