Miscellaneous: Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old... - FML

By cheese123 - 03/01/2012 05:25 - United States

Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old granddaughter "who has never been kissed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 280

You deserved it 3 216

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Same thing different taste

Loveless

By loveless - 18/02/2010 05:07 - United States

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 893

You deserved it 4 610

By wtf - 10/01/2014 16:47 - United States - Delmar

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 045

You deserved it 4 982

By Anonymous - 09/05/2015 20:50

Today, my drunk grandma flashed me, after confusing me, a 19 year old girl, for my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 913

You deserved it 2 355

By Anonymous - 05/10/2009 20:10 - United States

Today, I was on a plane with my grandma. A cute guy sat down next to her. She asked his age. He told her he was 16. She said, "Oh, that's how old my granddaughter here is." She then turned to me and said loudly, "You should switch seats with me, he's HOT!" Well, at least Grandma loves me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 243

You deserved it 6 269

Relationship specialist

By Anonymous - 16/10/2023 13:00

Today, I attended a family reunion, during which my grandma gave me "relationship advice" in front of everyone. She's been married five times, and her longest marriage lasted a whole 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 675

You deserved it 87

By MrDisgrace - 17/09/2017 13:00

Today, my mom bitched me out in front of my friends because I had my first kiss at "such a young age". She's 15 years older than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 564

You deserved it 373

By Forever alone Guy - 19/02/2013 23:07 - Australia - Narre Warren

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 135

You deserved it 3 824

By Bullet - 13/08/2010 16:28 - United States

Today, I had to go along with my mom to meet some of her old friends from high school. When they asked her about how her life was going, she said she was married, always traveling, no kids, and introduced me as the neighbor's kid she babysits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 281

You deserved it 3 373

Gammy got game

By moetplease - 03/05/2012 16:32 - Singapore

Today, my grandma moved in with us. Along with her 36-year-old boyfriend that none of us knew about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 755

You deserved it 3 816

Faint praise

By Anonymous - 09/06/2021 12:02 - Romania - Iasi

Today, we had a group of friends over, as well as my grandma. She started talking about me when I was a kid, when I suddenly heard her saying, "Well, yeah, she wasn’t a beautiful child, not at all, she looked.… OK." FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 95

Next

Top comments

gazzdogs 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 11:49

1. Get Hamster 2. Call it virginity 3. Lose Hamster Close Enough.

Garzoo 4

Tuesday 3 January 2012 11:48

Time will come, make it a special moment. Don't take it to the heart.

Comments

bubo_fml 10

Wednesday 4 January 2012 1:42

"This is,my sweet lil' Granddaughter whose never been kissed...But...She can sure suck the green outa grass, the white outa rice, the chrome off a trailer hitch, a golf ball thru a garden hose, a tennis ball through a tennis racket..." (I gotta million of 'em!)

InYourFace77 0

Wednesday 4 January 2012 2:32

Did one volunteer to change that?

zebralover23 14

Wednesday 4 January 2012 2:46

Haha, now you know not to tell your grandma secrets.

SRabbit 11

Wednesday 4 January 2012 3:05

I don't think this is that bad. She didn't say it in front of boys your age. I waited till I was 20 for my first kiss.

SaMmIMonster96 6

Wednesday 4 January 2012 3:12

That is alright, it

nickalibhai 0

Wednesday 4 January 2012 5:09

What r u doing climb that girl and video tape it for me jkjkjk

Medcanyon 10

Wednesday 4 January 2012 5:24

Wow ur really cute to not have been kissed

Medcanyon 10

Wednesday 4 January 2012 5:31

It's okay to not have your first kiss your just the person that doesnt like to kiss or do things with people

seandaniel13 2

Wednesday 4 January 2012 5:32

Lol my nan thinks I ain't been kissed either dw what your nan thinks its your nan who gives a shit I'll kiss ya iv your ever in England

SpeakOutLoud 1

Wednesday 4 January 2012 5:59

How does she know that?

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The Top

Today, the host family that I'm staying with in China gave me a small milk box to drink. It tasted a bit tangy and sour, but I thought that was probably just the taste of milk in China. Trying to be polite, I practically chugged the whole box. Later, I found out that it had expired 20 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 543

You deserved it 372

Today, it's Thanksgiving and I've spent the last few days imploring my husband not to antagonize my Trump-loving family by talking about the fact that they didn't look into what tariffs were at the time, and now they might have to close their business. Wish me luck… FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 234

The Top

Today, I wanted to get my mind off my ex, so like any other guy I decided to watch some porn and jack it. I see one video with a familiar looking room so I click on it. Guess who I saw getting it from some dude? So much for forgetting about my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 457

You deserved it 602

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 669

You deserved it 3 982

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 600

You deserved it 5 708

Today, I saw my ex-girlfriend. She dumped me because she was moving to Wyoming. I guess Wyoming is code for my friend's apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 232

You deserved it 139

Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 662

You deserved it 4 984

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 530

You deserved it 12 104