Money: Today, my husband called me in the middle of the morning. He...

By Anonymous - 23/05/2012 21:14 - United States

Today, my husband called me in the middle of the morning. He was in jail and wanted me to bail him out. Not only was he stupid enough to go drunk drag-racing with his buddies, their route took them straight past the front of the local police precinct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 498

You deserved it 3 387

When Christmas Ends Badly…
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Same thing different taste

By bellaskyeb - 08/01/2012 17:42 - United States

Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 274

You deserved it 4 252

By mackenzie_cain - 14/01/2010 05:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went to jail for a DUI. In a panic, I rushed to go bail him out. On the way to the jail I was stopped for running a red light. I soon joined my boyfriend in jail with my very own DUI charge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 439

You deserved it 65 653

Jailbird

By blondebarbie271 - 26/07/2015 23:55 - United States - Center Barnstead

Today, I had to bail my ex-husband out of jail. He didn't want his new wife to get mad at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 348

You deserved it 14 501

He's a good man

By no booze, no boyfriend - 04/06/2013 20:31 - United States

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me from jail, expecting me to bail him out. He'd tried to buy a load of booze at the liquor store and came up short by ten cents. The cashier refused to be short-changed, and he figured the only reasonable reaction was to punch her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 141

You deserved it 4 663

The nerve of some people

By Inga44 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 144

You deserved it 3 779

No good deed…

By SCdriver - 16/07/2012 06:04 - United States - Lexington

Today, I called the cops to let them know that a drunk man was driving dangerously down my road. About an hour later, I was going to the store and got pulled over for speeding by the cop I called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 234

You deserved it 36 245

Bad boys bad boys

By addie - 03/03/2013 08:27 - United States

Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 241

You deserved it 3 077

By young and dumb - 27/08/2016 06:27 - United States - Trenton

Today, I got married to the man I love even though my whole family told me not to marry him. He got into a drunken fight at our wedding and is now in jail. He apparently won't be getting out any time soon due to charges I didn't know about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 713

You deserved it 3 275

Drunk dick

By Anonymous - 07/10/2019 20:00

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called the cops on me and told them I wasn’t letting him in the house. His keys were in the door, he was just too drunk to unlock it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 851

You deserved it 181

Nice husband you've got there…

By dididikaisik - 01/08/2021 05:01 - United States

Today, I received a call from my husband of 10 years from prison. He sobbed on the phone as he explained to me that his anger got the best of him, and couldn’t control himself. He beat the pulp out of a classmate of his for declining a date with him, and sent her to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 356

You deserved it 107

hatesfate 6

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:01

Please don't have children with this idiot. Genes as stupid as those need to stop spreading..

missanderson813 4

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:01

Shouldnt bail him out. He needs to learn from his stupidity.

Comments

hommiecogley 8

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:47

He was only trying to have some fun. But I would make stay the night cause he could of killed someone or even himself. No drinking and driving. He needs to learn that.

comeatmebroo6254 1

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:54

And that's why dumb men don't marry dumb women. There's a world of possibilities without a responsible one in the relationship.

vbmg152 18

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:54

I'd definitely leave him there for the night!! What was he doing out drinking in the middle of the night, anyway? He should've been home where he belongs!

circulareasoning 2

Thursday 24 May 2012 0:57

Well...? Who won the drag race?

pexy_fml 16

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:04

He Is not stupid he is drunk

iluvpm1999 1

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:04

Divorce his ass

The_Troller 14

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:08

Looks like we've got a comedian here.

SarcasticGuy 5

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:17

There isn't a single person alive that hasn't done something stupid, just not everyone's been caught. Don't worry he'll be out as soon as he's sober and hopefully learn from it.

twisted_cherub 14

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:39

I've done embarrassing things, made stupid decisions about fashion or guys I dated, sure. I even put myself at risk for a few broken bones once or twice. But this is beyond normal stupidity. He was drag racing DRUNK. He could have killed himself or others. He's lucky the cops picked his sorry butt up before he did real damage.

SarcasticGuy 5

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:17

There isn't a single person alive that hasn't done something stupid, just not everyone's been caught. Don't worry he'll be out as soon as he's sober and hopefully learn from it.

leannez 21

Thursday 24 May 2012 1:20

The amount of deaths caused by drunk drivers and by street racers, separately, is terrifying. He's lucky that his dumb a** only went to jail for a day.