Miscellaneous: Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort...

By idontevencareanymore - 23/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Jarrell

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 214

You deserved it 4 708

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Same thing different taste

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 449

You deserved it 3 817

By speed-dialing dr kevorkian - 27/02/2016 07:25 - United States - Two Rivers

Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 163

You deserved it 1 322

By roselysunset - 29/07/2015 17:07 - United States - Cypress

Today, I came home to find my mom drunk. She asked me for a hug and then started crying, "Where's my daughter?" I'm her daughter. And her only child, as far as I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 770

You deserved it 1 636

This is fine

By Anonymous - 07/08/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 98

By wtf mom - 31/05/2013 04:20 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 757

You deserved it 3 537

By Anonymous - 24/12/2018 12:00

Today, my Mom found out that I've been intimate with one of my best friends in the past. We used protection, it never went anywhere, and we ended it amicably, but she still gave me a huge lecture. Later, she high-fived and congratulated him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 707

You deserved it 502

By anonymous - 19/08/2013 05:41 - United States - Lamar

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 393

You deserved it 3 059

By Anonymous - 05/03/2011 11:43 - France

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 901

You deserved it 4 908

Mum

By mummer11 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Ireland

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred, "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 421

You deserved it 3 205

By Anonymous - 09/05/2014 23:57 - United States - Akron

Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 445

You deserved it 4 152

razi1 20

Saturday 24 May 2014 1:05

Aw and they said size doesn't matter :p

715chiefs 15

Saturday 24 May 2014 1:10

The last time my mom got drunk, she left me at a diner in the middle of Nebraska. 50 miles away from where we lived.

Comments

handsome_jack 2

Saturday 24 May 2014 16:51

You married your dad's wife?

cmb8280 24

Saturday 24 May 2014 21:14

In all fairness, you did ask.

alicat13 12

Sunday 25 May 2014 1:12

It's a pleasure! Any more valuable information you still require?

pitapizzaparty 18

Sunday 25 May 2014 6:55

U asked tho and shes drunk and she doesnt really think

TheDevilWearsJoe 8

Monday 26 May 2014 1:30

Well, OP, you were asking for it.

katie1989 9

Monday 26 May 2014 4:43

My husband has a large member and I myself am very small. Since having a baby, sex is must more comfortable as it doesn't take 15 minutes to get it in there. Too big is much worse than too small.