Intimacy: Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn...

By theassman - 11/03/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn on my laptop so she wouldn't see I was watching it. It turns out I was watching an old Beatles concert before I started masturbating. My mom thought I was masturbating to the Beatles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 147

You deserved it 80 579

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Same thing different taste

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By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 23:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 785

You deserved it 32 356

How could you?

By Anonymous - 29/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML

I agree, your life sucks 188

You deserved it 845

By Anonymous user - 09/08/2018 06:00

Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 046

You deserved it 2 955

Play it cool

By Fraser - 08/03/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 203

You deserved it 56 646

Caught red-handed

By caught - 09/01/2012 00:43 - United States

Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 336

You deserved it 36 291

By Anonymous - 20/05/2016 16:59 - United States - Harker Heights

Today, my brother walked in on me jerking off. I managed to close the porn tab, at least, only to end up on my mom's Facebook profile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 408

You deserved it 6 754

MILF

By Anonymous - 12/11/2020 08:03

Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 294

You deserved it 601

By ikungfuyou - 27/12/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 723

You deserved it 10 244

By ShadowJack - 29/04/2012 15:10 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 485

You deserved it 9 785

Surprise !

By Shrekkk - 02/07/2019 06:14

Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 590

GameRater01 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 13:33

I never realized there were so many people in the world without access to rooms with locks as when I started coming to fmylife

jESuS_lOVeS_mE69 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 13:35

So is it safe to assume i'm the only one who masterbates to old Beatles concerts?

Comments

divxman_fml 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 0:09

lol i love this website

FMLallstar 0

Friday 27 March 2009 21:40

nothing wrong with jerking to the beatles man

dm479mm 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 4:08

I love the beatles. Mmmmm...beatles...

annoying 0

Friday 3 April 2009 22:31

if u dont wanna jack ur self off u can put it in my ****** email [email protected]

SeiferAlmasy 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 2:10

@ op: you just gave audiophile a brand new meaning

AkihiroHattori5 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 6:27

the Beatles are good, but they're not THAT good. Your mom should've known that you weren't pleasuring yourself over the Beatles (trying not to laugh) no one is that big of a fan!

dezzxll3 0

Sunday 19 April 2009 23:58

hahaha wow.

Antonio718 0

Monday 20 April 2009 4:20

Lmao wow!! Today I went to see what my son was doing...as i walked in i saw his pants down...he was masturbating...and when i looked at the computer the beatles were on...my son was masturbating for the beatles?