Intimacy: Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap...

By anonymous - 09/09/2013 20:16 - United States - Round Rock

Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 887

You deserved it 6 866

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Same thing different taste

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 408

You deserved it 207

By levi Glasscock - 15/04/2011 13:52 - United States

Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 134

You deserved it 2 982

By queen_lol - 10/05/2016 17:14 - United States

Today, I was at a party at my boyfriend's house. As I was walking past him, he pulled me onto his lap and started introducing me to a childhood friend. I sneezed and accidently peed on him. I'm 6 months pregnant and can't control my bladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 514

You deserved it 2 186

By Nurse - 31/08/2018 15:00

Today, a pregnant woman asked me to give her a demonstration on how to push when having a baby. I agreed and pushed, but I may have pushed a little too hard because I shat myself. The pregnant woman laughed and said she was hoping that would happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 885

You deserved it 753

By bootyislife - 03/02/2015 04:36 - United States - Seattle

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 260

You deserved it 4 987

By Anonymous - 15/09/2014 18:48 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 184

You deserved it 4 389

Hello from the other side

By losthusband - 11/10/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 173

You deserved it 205

By Username - 05/11/2010 22:02 - France

Today, I was reading to a child during nap time because she woke up crying. She calmed down right after I began reading, but soon started crying again. I was confused until I felt something warm and wet on my leg. She peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 035

You deserved it 3 631

I'm in a hurry

By Anonymous - 20/01/2020 20:00

Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 541

You deserved it 144

By amburrr - 03/08/2009 00:59 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 57 887

You deserved it 2 665

vrossie_ 15

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:03

Well, at least you made her laugh! Right?

slooby_fml 25

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:03

She's just preparing you for what a child will be like

Comments

Bunny21 11

Tuesday 10 September 2013 1:58

You're a good sweet man, need more of you out there. Never change OP and congrats!!!

LegolasPrincess 10

Tuesday 10 September 2013 2:08

Congrats on the baby, but you should get used to that. The baby is going to do plenty of it.

Pinup_doll94 4

Tuesday 10 September 2013 2:24

Shit happens, or should I say piss happens? Either way, cheer up, at least you made her smile.

DFresh503 8

Tuesday 10 September 2013 2:29

Those mood swings are extreme. Crying to laughing... To peeing

LaurenLo 17

Tuesday 10 September 2013 2:49

Well hey! You can't blame pregnant ladies! Haha

Poetaster 10

Tuesday 10 September 2013 3:09

At least it was warm!

Belthazor_fml 5

Tuesday 10 September 2013 3:21

She's your wife, OP. Smile, roll your eyes and laugh about it....

Neesalun 20

Tuesday 10 September 2013 4:15

That's really sweet that you tried to comfort her! I'm sure despite the peeing, that she appreciated it.

rhevenge 19

Tuesday 10 September 2013 4:32

I never peed on anyone but I did pee the bathroom rug a few times in front of the toilet....my daughter loved to let me make it almost far enough, she always has had a sense of humor. congrats on the coming child op!