Miscellaneous: Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 19:10 - United States - Findlay

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 786

You deserved it 10 009

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By J - 11/02/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 186

You deserved it 8 854

By goldendarkness - 09/07/2016 01:34

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to stop by a drive-thru on the way to his place. I asked him to order a Coke for me, at which point he asked if I wanted to make it a Diet Coke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 768

You deserved it 2 967

By hadrienne's pall - 13/05/2016 19:25 - Canada - Markham

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 977

You deserved it 4 283

By Hungryman - 15/01/2010 21:30 - France

Today, I ordered a Diet Coke with my meal from a fast food restaurant. Turns out, they didn't give me diet. My blood sugar spiked and I was sick for hours later. I'm a diabetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 404

You deserved it 8 253

Thanks Karen

By Anonymous - 26/08/2014 15:30 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 684

You deserved it 4 366

By first time at McDonald's in months... - 27/03/2013 05:04 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 234

You deserved it 19 347

First impressions

By Anonymous - 03/03/2021 23:01

Today, while on a date, I accidentally ordered "diet water" instead of saying "diet coke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 298

Typecast

By nerd - 16/10/2009 15:08 - Singapore

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food, I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - Nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 422

You deserved it 5 757

By fatty - 29/04/2015 01:36 - United States - West Chester

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 322

You deserved it 5 248

By sportskidguru - 01/02/2009 14:41 - United States

Today, I was refilling some guy's iced tea at bandana's, and the uppity jerk had the gall to ask me if I ever kissed a girl considering how fat I am, how high my voice is, and how little money I make. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 580

You deserved it 3 717

Next

Top comments

plasticsmile42 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:04

Wow, what an ass. dont let him/her get to you op!

MainPrism 16

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:05

I really hope you obeyed the cardinal rule of the food industry & waited til after you got your food before telling the waiter what you thought of them... If not, you ate something extra with your food... Pretty much gauranteed...

Comments

firefighterjohn 9

Friday 6 July 2012 4:31

I wonder wtf was up his ass. my god

GhostDuck 30

Friday 6 July 2012 4:31

I have a feeling this is the same waiter that told [another] OP that if they eat too many breadsticks they'll get "fatter".

monkiki62 5

Friday 6 July 2012 4:35

Wow op don't worry if he has that kind of attitude he will get fired. You can help with that by calling the place and reporting him.

cdsg23 15

Friday 6 July 2012 4:36

That's pretty aweful, but I have to give the waiter bonus points for the Gabriel Iglesias reference.

mojoboss 0

Friday 6 July 2012 4:45

There is no way this is true

MandieL 27

Friday 6 July 2012 4:46

I hope you slapped him.

notepie 6

Friday 6 July 2012 4:48

What an ass hole. I would have asked for a manager and got either a free meal out of it or walked!!!

Brownie101abc 7

Friday 6 July 2012 4:49

Did you go to hooters or something

stfuNOWplease 6

Friday 6 July 2012 4:52

Should have said, "no, want a milkshake"

KA16 4

Friday 6 July 2012 4:57

You deserved it!! Maybe work out more!?

THE_A_TEEN 27

Friday 6 July 2012 5:31

Are you ******* kidding me? Who deserves to be insulted by a waiter? Unless you are a really bad customer, no one deserves to be insulted by a waiter. It's really rude and unprofessional to aft like that during work. And if ypu think she deserves it because she's fat, you're justifying that anyone can be insulted just as long as they're fat. Get your head out of your arse!

THE_A_TEEN 27

Friday 6 July 2012 5:45

*act *you

10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19

Keywords

Miscellaneous TV shows Coworkers Work Awkward Politics Embarrassing Ironic Relatable Transportation Instagram Social Media Shopping Parenting Love AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Kids Friends Dogs Pranks Housework Cars Technology Porn Health Sports Accident Mental health

The Top

Today, I went to the grocery store, but once I'd filled my cart, I realized that I'd forgotten my wallet, and because I'm not the sort of animal who just dumps stuff in random aisles, I had to awkwardly put all my items back on their shelves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 202

Good morning guys! Today's interview has been done in some extreme circumstances. It was about 36° Celsius, and half of the Completely Serious Comics crew was working while the other one was cooking. Well, it was a bit crazy as you can imagine. So m...

I agree, your life sucks 18

You deserved it 17

The Top

Today, my aunt informed me that my dad thinks my boyfriend is a loser deadbeat because he hasn't proposed to me after two years of dating and co-habitation. He hasn't asked because I already made it very clear I have no interest in marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 369

You deserved it 4 867

Today, after about a year of keeping it a secret from my girlfriend, I told her about my foot fetish. She said "EWWWWWWWW!" and left. She's ignoring my calls and has changed her relationship status to single on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 570

You deserved it 6 603

Today, my stepmom accused me of creeping around, acting sneaky, and maybe even planning to kill her in her sleep because I’m "still angry at my dad divorcing my mom and marrying her." All I did was get up at 2 a.m. for a pee at coincidentally the same time as she was going outside for a cigarette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 86

Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 828

You deserved it 32 549

Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 963

You deserved it 3 795

Today, I told my roommate she had to pay $55 to replace a piece of the oven she broke. She told me I was being selfish and decided to illegally break our lease because I was, "making her feel unsafe." Now I not only have to pay for the oven repair, I also have to pay her next two month's rent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 276

You deserved it 197