Love: Today, my wife and I had a huge fight. I was getting ready to...

By Anonymous - 12/12/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my wife and I had a huge fight. I was getting ready to go to sleep on the couch when she came downstairs and grabbed a very large metal spoon. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 960

You deserved it 4 243

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/06/2016 23:24 - United States - Winder

Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 559

You deserved it 1 090

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By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 045

You deserved it 8 843

By PanFace - 13/10/2009 06:54 - Australia

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 117

You deserved it 121 362

By Mouhahaa - 09/05/2012 03:48 - France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 655

You deserved it 36 372

Action - Reaction

By CaptBlood - 21/05/2021 00:01

Today, before I went to work, I wanted to kiss my wife goodbye while she was asleep, She punched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 183

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By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife picked a fight with a guy twice my size, then expected me to “man up and teach the bitch a lesson.” I’m not insane so I of course refused to fight, then she locked me out of the house for embarrassing her in front of her sisters. I want a frisking divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 16/11/2010 02:02 - United States

Today, my wife and I had one of the biggest arguments we've ever had, which resulted in her leaving, going to her parents' house and calling me twice, screaming and sobbing. The argument was over a seven dollar bottle of wine. Apparently, she was "saving it for a special occasion." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 341

You deserved it 5 249

By Anonymous - 27/08/2012 02:56 - United States - Riverside

Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument, which resulted in her begging for a divorce, and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 864

You deserved it 2 478

Heavy sleeper

By good_aim - 27/07/2013 08:03 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 303

You deserved it 26 914

By Anonymous - 01/01/2013 21:33 - United States - Carrollton

Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 245

You deserved it 6 562

WCARlover 34

Monday 12 December 2011 8:52

OP and wife fought OP went downstairs to couch OP's wife grabbed spoon Spoon can be used to hurt people OP afraid

SilentTreatment 7

Monday 12 December 2011 9:06

Well since OP isn't sleeping in the same bed with her, she probably wanted something to spoon with! :P

Comments

Jasonf6 0

Monday 12 December 2011 13:33

Why is it that when a man and a woman have a fight it's the man who sleeps on the couch?

kaykay20 0

Monday 12 December 2011 20:06

The woman has more control in the relationship and the guy may feel at fault or just unwilling to settle the issue choosing to submit to being on the couch verse talking it out and sleeping in the same bed. Either way it's puts a lot of strain on their relationship.

GypsyRover 0

Monday 12 December 2011 14:09

I sure as hell don't sleep on the couch!! If she wants me on the couch,I'll get another woman,and she can get out!

rubberduckie94 13

Monday 12 December 2011 14:23

ydi for going to the couch. your a man not a dog.

live2swim 5

Monday 12 December 2011 14:26

Haha probably for a tub of ice-cream :)

sjhill 32

Monday 12 December 2011 15:00

What's your wife going to do with a spoon? Just be happy it wasn't a spork or a knife

EmperorHilo 11

Monday 12 December 2011 15:04

Man up, apologize and try to make amends of the situation

EvilDave 13

Monday 12 December 2011 15:29

Why should he apologize? A real man doesn't apologize unless he is wrong. Looks like you believe men are always wrong in these situations. I am guessing you are a self-hating male feminista.

DocBastard 38

Monday 12 December 2011 16:50

...or he's just a smart man who knows how to pick his battles. If my wife is wrong (which is RARE) but continues to argue, she knows she's wrong. If I end up apologising, we both STILL knows she's wrong, but the fight is over and we can move on with our lives. Diplomacy goes a long way in a marriage. If you really insist on being right all the time, you won't get far.

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 12 December 2011 15:04

Lorenaaa...

perdix 29

Monday 12 December 2011 15:37

Don't worry, it's not you that is going to be receiving the pounding from the spoon. After a good night with Steely Dan, your fleshy, little penis will not be good enough to get you back in the bedroom. Just go meekly to work to support your wife and her ferrous boyfriend.