Transportation: Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 724

You deserved it 4 349

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/12/2009 05:16 - United States

Today, I was riding the train home, and I sat in the row in front of a homeless woman. I noticed an old man staring at me. I got off the train after a long 6 stops, and the old man who had been staring at me walks up to me and says "The lady behind you was flicking lice onto you the whole time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 858

You deserved it 2 604

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 08:38 - United Kingdom - Colchester

Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a homeless man. As we left the train he shook my hand and was seemingly on his way. That was until he caught me greeting my boyfriend, to which he decided to tell the romantic story of how he murdered a man for "getting too close to his woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 885

You deserved it 3 144

By dadadoo - 06/02/2012 04:09 - United States

Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 865

You deserved it 3 331

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:36 - United States

Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 984

You deserved it 3 573

NYC public transport

By Anonymous - 04/12/2020 17:02 - United States - New York

Today, there was a pretty girl sitting near me on the train home. I thought about asking for her number., but instead a drunk nitwit decided to wander around the car and came very close to touching her. She got up and moved to the other end, while I had to deal with a belligerent hobo who was now intent on fighting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 184

By Anonymous - 18/05/2018 20:30

Today, on the train, a man kept grabbing my crotch. When I told him to stop, I got yelled at for harassing an elderly man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 243

You deserved it 307

The joys of public transport

By InPain - 17/10/2019 16:00

Today, while riding the train, some druggie got into a dispute with some random passengers. Even though I didn't even look at them fighting, he decided I was a threat and punched me, a pregnant woman, and some bikers. Now I've got a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 918

You deserved it 149

By Anonymous - 28/06/2012 21:20 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 806

You deserved it 2 176

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 16:46 - France

Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 622

You deserved it 3 699

Public transport FTW

By Anonymous - 17/10/2020 17:03

Today, I was riding the subway home after a long shift at hospital. I accidentally made eye contact with a sketchy dude for a split second. He launched a wide spray of spit at me. At least I was wearing scrubs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 133

m311 6

Wednesday 29 December 2010 12:14

bite him back

Sonfang 19

Wednesday 29 December 2010 13:54

...And so begins the zombie invasion!

Comments

IBMoondance23 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 15:28

get checked out! seriously go to doc asafp not joking!

KaintukeeBob 13

Wednesday 29 December 2010 15:31

I for one welcome our new zombie underlords.

fruityloopz 4

Wednesday 29 December 2010 15:45

you gotta enjoy the little things.

kova09 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 17:58

lol!! U made my day!

quin01 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 15:56

ur gunna turn into a homelessman now

OddBob 1

Wednesday 29 December 2010 15:58

Human bites are the most dangerous kind, to other humans. Get your ass to a doctor NOW, before a serious infection gets a chance to take hold!

Dillandinator 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:07

Dude! Haven't you seen Zombieland? We're all screwed now,thanks asshole...

MrRawwr84 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 17:37

******* careless bitch ! rule one my friend cardio! the fatties go first!

Honesty4U 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:07

HOMELESS ZOMBIE!!! Reminds me of Gangs of the Dead…

Dillandinator 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:09

Dude! Haven't you seen Zombieland? We're all screwed now,thanks asshole...

Mariebel 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:42

poor homeless man, you must've tasted disgusting. Probably too bitchy for his taste.

thamavrikx7 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:47

lol that's how zombieland started out

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The Top

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 939

You deserved it 7 935

Today, the lullaby I sing to my toddler makes my husband fall asleep faster than her, so basically I have to choose between not having sex or having to put up with a cranky overtired hyperactive toddler. Our house has a single bedroom where we all co-sleep, so I guess it's option one for now for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 154

You deserved it 384

The Top

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 446

You deserved it 5 788

Today, a toddler threw up on my backpack mid-flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 622

You deserved it 382

Today, I introduced my ex-wife to my new girlfriend. They got along so well that my new girlfriend is going to my ex-wife's house tonight "just to hang out". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 440

You deserved it 24 221

Today, I was running a D&D game. I invited my nephew to come along to try and distract him, as his brother took his life two weeks ago. Stupidly, I had only skimmed through the module I was running (as I run multiple) and didn't realise that today's session involved gallows. Guess how his brother took his life? FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 309

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 188

You deserved it 8 078

Today, my husband and I recently decided not to have kids, because neither of us like children. Learning this, my dad wrote me out of his will and my mother swore on the Bible in church that she’s never going to speak to me again until I obey God's word and start multiplying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 437

You deserved it 287

Same thing different taste

NYC public transport

The joys of public transport

Public transport FTW

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