Health: Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face...

By Username - 15/07/2011 19:51 - United States

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 204

You deserved it 7 946

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Same thing different taste

By Ouchhh - 25/05/2010 06:54 - United States

Today, I leaned back and bumped into one of my mom's plants in the window. The good thing was that I caught it before it fell and shattered. The bad thing was that my mom likes to keep cactii in the window. I can still feel thorns I haven't managed to pluck out yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 907

You deserved it 4 554

By Anonymous - 27/10/2017 06:03

Today, I purchased a cactus in a cute little pot and put it on my windowsill so it could get sun. Unfortunately, that's also where I have my alarm clock. Guess which one I grabbed in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 234

You deserved it 2 696

By thanksdad - 16/03/2014 19:28 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 820

You deserved it 6 294

By Anonymous - 29/02/2012 16:52 - United States

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 410

You deserved it 32 999

By TheSublime - 21/10/2009 13:54 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping a friend redecorate. She had put up some shelving, that we presumed was stable. It broke, and all the expensive vases and collectables fell to the floor. On instinct, I leapt forward to catch the closest thing. It was not the expensive vase. It was a cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 866

You deserved it 4 655

It hurts when I pee

By yomamma787 - 24/11/2009 17:11 - United States

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 898

You deserved it 54 456

Shout the victory

By dogpatch087 - 02/01/2020 03:00 - United States - Ventura

Today, while climbing a mountain, I got to the top and then put both of my arms up in a victory kind of way only to trip on a rock and fall into a cactus plant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 505

Blind rage

By prickly - 11/10/2009 16:48 - United States

Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 046

You deserved it 2 859

By Anon - 24/03/2012 02:42 - United States

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 413

You deserved it 32 295

By Anonymous - 31/08/2014 17:51 - United States

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 516

You deserved it 3 876

GigaB 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 0:38

don't sleep under a cactus?

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:27

Faceplant.

Comments

cumsukmikehawk 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 2:47

in the face!!!

keyboo 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 2:51

what is OP mean

jane79 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 5:57

op stands for original poster, the person who posted the fml

twerpzilla 1

Saturday 16 July 2011 2:53

"I pray a flower box falls from your window sill and knocks you on the head like I'd like to." This FML reminded me of this song

NayNay14 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 2:54

how...?

izzaahti 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:01

ouchh... but why would you sleep there?

amynameisannie 2

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:02

ouch! are u ok?

crazyrunnergirl 7

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:27

hmm. so it fell INTO your face? interesting.

wriptidez 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:28

feel better soon hugz

ArsenalFan12 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:37

plantmaggedon!!

ham25 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:45

you can't really say it's happened to everybody...

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my mother and wife are arguing over raising our baby Catholic or Church of England. They’re mad at each other and as a bonus they’re both mad at me because I’m non-religious and genuinely don’t care which made-up religion they try to raise her in, I’m just enjoying being a dad over here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 163

Today, the girl I love who friendzoned me called to talk. She shared the marvelous things she'd done for her friend's birthday, then said, "You had a recent birthday too." Then she laughed. We'd talked multiple times without her mentioning my birthday. She ignored it on Facebook. Time for no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 194

The Top

Today, I accidentally dropped the batch of bread that was ready for the oven, after waiting for two hours. We have nothing else to eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 184

Today, I was going to ask my parents for advice on how to get my ex-girlfriend back. I overheard them talking about how glad they were that their plan to break us up worked so well. I don't think I should ask for advice anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 539

You deserved it 2 706

Today, I was in agonizing pain and couldn't move. My parents said they couldn't take me to the ER until the football game on TV was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 936

You deserved it 3 334

Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 879

You deserved it 7 341

Today, I had sex for the first time with my first boyfriend. We broke up 6 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 553

You deserved it 10 589

Today, my very financially stable grandparents bought my girlfriend and I two first class tickets on Air Emirates, which to me is a once in a lifetime opportunity. To my dismay, my colon did not approve of the peanuts and I spent the whole flight shitting out what seemed to be molten rocks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 406

You deserved it 223

Same thing different taste

It hurts when I pee

Shout the victory

Blind rage

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