Work: Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about...

By Anonymous - 25/03/2015 19:00 - United States - Point Pleasant Beach

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayn Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 864

You deserved it 4 947

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/03/2015 13:20 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 494

You deserved it 3 641

Oh, he's a "Nice Guy"

By undateable - 18/10/2020 02:01 - United States

Today, I tried to drown out the petulant whining of my idiot coworker as he droned on and on about how, “bitches don’t appreciate good men.” He’s 35, lives at home, still uses the term 'friendzone' and has the hygiene of a sewer-dwelling ogre. I was written up for for snapping and yelling at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 388

You deserved it 223

Difficult

By Anonymous - 30/06/2021 20:01

Today, a patient, who is normally pretty chill, was being quite difficult for my workmates. They were whinging about him and I defended him, he's normally a sweet guy so something must be upsetting him. I went to chat with him, he punched me and called a useless a**hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 01/08/2012 20:59 - United Kingdom - Bedford

Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 444

You deserved it 36 355

Cards on the table

By Anonymous - 21/07/2023 22:00

Today, I'm thinking of quitting the awesome job I love with coworkers I adore, because I keep fucking up every part of my job, making them pick up the pieces and correct my failures. They don't deserve this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 680

You deserved it 271

Meritocracy

By DazedAndConfused - 14/11/2021 11:00

Today, like every day, my coworker showed up thirty minutes late, sat down for thirty more checking email while I got the morning work done alone, listening to her bitch about how much she hates her job and wants to go home. My coworkers criticized me for being moody, and praised her for being the best. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 062

You deserved it 110

Don't date coworkers

By Pastrygirl - 11/07/2016 22:00

Today, while finishing up at work, I started helping a co-worker out with his workload since I'd finished mine. His girlfriend apparently didn't like this and started slamming things around, constantly muttering passive aggressive comments because she wanted to help him. I work with idiots. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 647

You deserved it 901

The angriest person on the internet

By Quinnald - 19/09/2022 06:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I found myself cussing out the next dipshit fucked in the head enough to open its bitch mouth and mumble to itself about how I was the newest main stressor of it’s bitch-fit of a day. Taking into account the pathetic aspect of “rubbing it in” I then proceeded to cuss out the next person who got in my way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 1 671

By StephiLynn - 09/05/2016 04:33 - United States - Hibbing

Today, my coworker told me when we got to work that she purposely left her phone at home. I then had to suffer 8 hours of listening to her constantly whine like a toddler about how much she missed her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 088

You deserved it 1 196

It doesn't exist

By getafucktoysomewhereelsedude - 16/05/2013 20:31 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I had to listen to yet another delusional fuckface at school bitch about how a girl he's interested in put him in the "friendzone". I really couldn't focus on my work, so I tried to shut him up by saying he's an idiot, not least because she already has a boyfriend. I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 405

You deserved it 17 331

WCARlover 34

Wednesday 25 March 2015 23:57

It's scary that there are workforce-aged people thinking like your coworkers 0.o

quesok 22

Thursday 26 March 2015 0:11

One Direction=Wrong Direction We all feel your pain

Comments

Roseberry3 12

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:12

You think that's bad? When the British band Take That had a member leave... And shortly after disbanded..... National Health had to set up suicide hot lines. It was such a travesty to the nation that shops closed, people faltered! Dreams shattered. Testimony to insanity!

KingSplatter 9

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:13

You almost got a YDI because I have no idea what a Zayne Malik or a One Direction is, but then you embraced your violent side. Good for you...and you thought you were pacifistic.

nialls_girl 13

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:19

Hmm his name is spelled Zayn. Glad this made FML. It's not immuned from anywhere.

russfml 31

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:25

The whole band should go one direction off the stage and walk the walk of shame, effin boy bands. FYL

greenbucket 6

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:43

Zayn**

greenbucket 6

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:45

He probably makes more money in one minute than you do in one month

Snaxia 12

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:45

It's disgusting that you people would think about resorting to violence just because some people like a band. There are worse things in this world than someone liking a band.

LouisGarou 6

Friday 27 March 2015 23:44

Such as not having any reading comprehension whatsoever.

ztodaro 24

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:47

I read the first 6 words and lost it "Today, three of my dipshit coworkers" xD

Snaxia 12

Thursday 26 March 2015 5:50

Seriously some of the comments I see people making here, it sounds like they came out of a young adult novel. You guys are seriously those cliche villains who are angry at everyone for no reason. Talking about beating people up. God what are you Draco Malfoy? Get a life and let people like what they want.