Love, Intimacy and Sex: Today, two of my girlfriends and I went to a bar. The only action...

By ailat0107 - 31/05/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, two of my girlfriends and I went to a bar. The only action any of us got was a 50 year-old man who came up and handed us, "An origami vagina for the pretty ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 196

You deserved it 5 663

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/06/2012 14:59 - Ireland - Cork

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 685

You deserved it 4 716

Missed the signs?

By Anonymous - 02/07/2022 04:00

Today, my husband and I visited a new bar in our city. It turned out to be a swingers sex club. He asked if we could stay and try it out, even though we were easily the oldest people there by about 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 176

Alpha male behavior

By Hotdamnthisismyjam - 16/06/2009 00:32 - Canada

Today, I went to the bar with some friends. When we walked in, we picked a table at random in the same area as a bunch of older men. The oldest, fattest, ugliest man at the table looked me over then stared at my chest. He then started to motorboat the air in the direction of my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 256

You deserved it 6 638

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 189

You deserved it 21 640

By number2 - 14/06/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, my friends and I were walking past a bar. There were a few cute guys "rating" every girl that walked by with number cards. My friend, who is a guy, got an 8. I got a 2. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 062

You deserved it 4 514

By awkward23 - 12/01/2010 10:26 - United States

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 985

You deserved it 42 526

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 01:20 - United States

Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 526

You deserved it 3 255

By hateskool888581 - 12/01/2010 00:28 - Mexico

Today, I went to a nearby nightclub with some friends and the girl I've been flirting for weeks. We were having a good time until this girl and two of her friends got back complaining about some "drunk-old-perverts harassing them". It looks like my dad and his friends are having a good time too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 921

You deserved it 2 347

Fair Warning

By TheNoseKnows - 16/02/2017 14:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, while sitting in a bar, I offered to buy the drunk chick sitting next to me a drink. She was a lot more inebriated than I thought, because she looked at me with bloodshot eyes and cheerfully responded, "There's a rotten smell in my vagina!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 877

You deserved it 2 595

By Anon - 28/01/2019 06:00 - United States - West Jefferson

Today, my girlfriend and I went on a date. I went to the bathroom. When I came back, she was sitting at a different table flirting with a guy that looked twice as old as her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 563

You deserved it 243

teehee520 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 22:47

Lmao, an origami vajayjay?! That's pretty awesome.

narwhalz 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 22:52

Just imagine what he can do with those hands!

Comments

youswallow 2

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:10

hahahah

hk_fml 9

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:10

Ewwww. I wonder how you make an origami ******.. xD so awkward

xClarkGable 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:13

wow, 10. Really? You have no idea if they're big, and even if they are, that doesn't mean they won't get any. Not all guys are shallow *****. OP: ydi for going out and assuming you'd have sex with a stranger.

lifesucks5 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:15

o.o

nwc020 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:27

old man FTW

bosco_kk 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:28

Lol, at least you know you are pretty.

bosco_kk 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 23:30

At least you know you are pretty...or told you are pretty. I know people who haven't been complimented on anything in their whole lives. And you have something most people don't: An origami ******! lol