Intimacy: Today, was my first experience having sex. It was also my first...

Sometimes you can do everything right with a condom but if she isn't wet enough on the inside then it will stick to he vaginal walls when you first enter her. If you keep thrusting it even further in it will rip... Happened to me

bsweet34 2

Saturday 23 May 2015 4:59

Wouldn't have been an FML if you weren't a sinner and waited till marriage

fallenkilljoy 13

Saturday 23 May 2015 5:09

You will soon be a dad

cbeigs 5

Saturday 23 May 2015 5:17

Are you 12

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CLICK HERE TO SEE THE ILLUSTRATED FMLMeghan's website : http://www.kawaiinot.com/ & http://www.murphypop.com/ If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. Bu...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 5

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. It’s a little awkward so I went to the bathroom to do two bumps of coke, came back to the table, and realized it was ketamine. I didn’t tell him, but I was so fucked up, he offered to get me an Uber home but I told him I called my mom to pick me up instead. He left and unmatched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33

You deserved it 1 388

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Today, instead of being an adult, my husband was more hysterical than my daughter during a hissy fit. It makes me want to divorce him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 188

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 491

You deserved it 5 579

Today, my mom wanted to kick me out of the house, but she has a brain tumor and can’t be left alone. I want to leave this place, but I can’t leave her. I’m ready to quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 93

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 998

You deserved it 4 110

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 378

You deserved it 7 426

Today, I was at a party and saw this girl who used to be overweight. She'd lost a significant amount of weight and looked so good, I went to chat her up. She immediately told me to get lost. According to her, if I "didn’t appreciate her at her worst, I don’t deserve her at her best." FML

I agree, your life sucks 321

You deserved it 2 779