Love: Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out...

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By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 752

You deserved it 6 426

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Sick burn

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 484

You deserved it 8 201

Baked

By Monty - 01/03/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 531

You deserved it 15 622

Kitchen nightmare

By cookiemonster - 13/08/2013 16:10 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 460

You deserved it 6 693

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 138

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 781

You deserved it 38 602

By burned - 24/05/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 117

You deserved it 64 159

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 655

You deserved it 3 499

By .. - 13/09/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 255

You deserved it 4 125

By Jlipka - 22/05/2010 02:33 - United States

Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 859

You deserved it 5 606

Smooth operator

By Nic - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 956

You deserved it 46 071

niiick97_fml 3

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:47

priceless.

xdust 4

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:49

Hansel and Grettal all over again. Your husband might be a witch.

Comments

Helloiloveyou199_fml 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:42

How do you know it was on accident? ;) Maybe he wanted to eat you?

TheGuyInsideU 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:41

kinky

DancerGirl123321 0

Monday 4 April 2011 0:00

Hansel and Gretel... what, did you try to eat your kids or something?

hsizzle 0

Monday 4 April 2011 0:23

Dang he might have been tryin to kill you..

A100893 30

Monday 4 April 2011 0:42

I hope someone illustrates this one.

Kadaver 1

Monday 4 April 2011 1:23

That's hot.

YANKS2728 0

Monday 4 April 2011 1:40

What's wrong with him?

franceypants 0

Monday 4 April 2011 1:41

he likes his ladies medium rare

TheNewGuy03 28

Monday 4 April 2011 15:25

well, in this case, i think he was going for well-done. |the kid|

Zaria0827 3

Monday 4 April 2011 1:42

i wud of cussed her out!.

ergo_fml 13

Monday 4 April 2011 1:53

This is why I'm afraid of ovens!!! D:

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 308

You deserved it 397

Today, my wife and I used to have sex at least 5 times a week, but since we said "I DO" at our wedding I’m lucky to get a shag once a month, and you can forget about blowjobs, I’ve not had one since before the wedding. Nothing about our life has changed to cause this, except we’re married now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 377

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 22 065

You deserved it 6 985

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I agree, your life sucks 42 546

You deserved it 3 475

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I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 1 645

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I agree, your life sucks 35 265

You deserved it 2 639

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I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 116

Today, my 35 year-old sister, who has no job or life, came downstairs and told me she knows I can hear her thoughts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 766

You deserved it 80