By Anonymous - 10/04/2012 17:47 - United States

Spicy
Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 311
You deserved it 3 302
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Top comments

DocBastard 38

That's when you ask her politely to stop the car. Then you get out and jump off the dock. Seriously, if parents don't want to hear about their kids' sexual exploits, they shouldn't share their own. Especially one where mom gets poked in the ass.

511 19

Comments

qwtf 14

Did he pull the splinter out for her before continuing? Lol

53 5
SkoomaKi 27

Not enough I reckon. Just think of that splinter ripping and tearing the inside of her rectum making her bleed over her boyfriend's dick. Ahhh tis a truly beautiful image! ^.^

14 3
Jakesterk96 8

Terrible mental image

9 1
Jakesterk96 8

Actually I was defining what TMI meant but it works both ways.

10 0
RedmontFief 7

87-That's weird I always knew it as too much info. But I guess they both apply....>.< Also, 12, both of your comments FAIL.

2 3
Jakesterk96 8

Tmi stands for too much info but we commentators like to give alternative meanings.

4 0
zingline89 18

That wasn't the first time your mom had wood in her poop chute.

119 4
Llamacod 11

Might have been the first, but it most definitely wasn't the last

16 0
5t3ff1k4h 44

No. Just because she commented about one time doesn't mean the kid's not getting any.

10 1
KiddNYC1O 20

I bet you get a lot of baboon ass, 17.

4 0
pagullarka 9

Should've asked, am I the result of that shenanigan.

20 2
coffee_man900 16

Right, he/she should have. WHO'S YOUR DADDY? :)

1 0
fishface517 10

Sure she wasn't joking? Sometimes people can be weird and joke about stuff like that.

6 25
molliepop19 5

What person could come up with that on their own?

2 9
ksquidette 2

Pretty sure she would know her own moms jokes...

2 4
loserman67 35

There are some things in life that cannot be undone. This my friend is one of them. Good luck trying to sleep tonight with images of your mother laying on the dock getting her brains ****** out by "some guy", standing up, crying about a splinter in her in her ass, Her ass with the little red lines from the cracks between the boards on the dock. Then climbing into the back of the guy's car, putting her legs behind her ears and getting finished off. Insomnia here you come!

44 5
Zomg_Okay 26

Why did I read your comment? ;_; Now I won't get any sleep either.

29 0
Girlybanana 2

Too much visual, you were the guy she ******, weren't you?

22 0
MakaPaka_fml 0

I got kinda horny from reading this >_

3 2