Health, Painful and Intimacy: Up it goes

Up it goes

By 0stvn0 - 16/03/2012 01:18 - Canada

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STI test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said, "Gonna be honest Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 759

You deserved it 5 692

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 14:25 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 187

You deserved it 40 099

Ouch

By Anonymous - 01/04/2018 05:00

Today, I went in for an STD test. The Q-tip broke off in my urethra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 543

You deserved it 437

Just in case

By Anonymous - 16/02/2016 07:39 - Australia - Balwyn North

Today, during an unrelated appointment with my GP, he offered me a free check for chlamydia. Despite me reassuring him that I was STI free, he insisted that I should undergo the test. I ended up agreeing, only because I was too embarrassed to admit that I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 393

You deserved it 5 160

Testing testing, one two one two

By regretter - 01/03/2011 01:07

Today, I paid €100 to have a tube shoved down my genitals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 986

You deserved it 7 779

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 215

Tough

By prostate - 08/06/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doctor inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 409

You deserved it 7 057

Prostate implies an Antistate

By artsmart1 - 06/03/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 411

You deserved it 2 947

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 212

By Jesse - 10/05/2012 21:22 - United States - Bothell

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 067

You deserved it 2 419

By la poisse - 19/11/2008 05:59 - France

Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 033

You deserved it 3 513

YourBuddyElmo 5

Friday 16 March 2012 5:40

On the bright side....nope, nothing's coming to me.

glittercookies 12

Friday 16 March 2012 5:41

It's worth it. You're being responsible and safe.

Comments

datgamerchick 14

Friday 16 March 2012 17:46

Honestly 111, if you're careful, having male genitals shouldn't be a problem at all. I'd honestly rather have male genitals than go through excruciating cramps and mood swings every month. Plus, the whole labor thing. That must hurt like a bitch.

asiandood 4

Friday 16 March 2012 17:57

Just hope they get it right on the first try!

runner543 1

Friday 16 March 2012 18:27

Try getstdtested.com - same test no swab

shaka_Z_0929007 10

Friday 16 March 2012 18:41

Don't they have home STD tests? It's less awkward for everybody if they do. Just saying...

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

Friday 16 March 2012 18:56

Like I said, pregnancy/childbirth is not mandatory, it is optional. Periods are absolutely horrible, of course, and usually little can be done about the pain. Since I don't have junk, I wouldn't know much about the subject, but it seems to me like a lot of males have one form of misfortune or another regarding their genitalia at least a few times a day. That or I just work with some really clumsy motherfuckers.

Equin0x 0

Friday 16 March 2012 18:58

No it's not really that bad, the thought of it hurt more than actually having it done.

iloveyou2129 6

Friday 16 March 2012 19:33

well steve there isnt anything i can tell u about that…

Jenn051692 0

Friday 16 March 2012 19:38

Ouch... On the brightside! You dont have to deliver a baby....

brandont03 1

Friday 16 March 2012 19:44

They are going to play a good old fashion game of "load the muscat" lol

m3lyc 18

Friday 16 March 2012 20:02

Been catheterized doesn't hurt. I had a cystoscopy (camera passed into my bladder through my urethra the other year), which is basically the same thing. Apart from some mild discomfort, it was painless. Just ensure he uses plenty of lubricant as the urethra is "sticky" by design.