Intimacy: Vibe check

Vibe check

By Hopelesslover - 04/08/2009 21:03 - Malta

Today, I was trying to give my girlfriend an orgasm as she was lying on her back. I asked her, "How do you like that, baby?" She responded by asking where I bought my suspended ceiling and spotlights, as she thought they would look good in her flat. She apparently got bored instead of turned on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 816

You deserved it 17 656

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Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

Honest

By fml1977 - 04/03/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 384

You deserved it 8 015

Bored

By Anonymous - 05/12/2022 14:00

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend felt the need to ask me if I could get my ladder and clean the ceiling, because it looked dusty with a spiderweb in the corner. I didn’t realise I was so boring in bed that she had the time to examine the ceiling and plan my chore list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 990

You deserved it 502

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 542

You deserved it 19 407

Sounds hot

By oops999 - 19/11/2013 19:46 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 013

You deserved it 9 487

By timmynotjimmy - 28/10/2009 01:28 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend told me how disappointed and depressed she was that she could never make me hard. She started ranting about her looks and how she fails at everything. I didn't know how to reply. I was hard while she told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 372

You deserved it 3 935

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 973

You deserved it 19 174

By undoable - 08/09/2010 23:14 - United States

Today, I was doing it with my girlfriend. Trying to be sexy, I moaned her name. She replied, "What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 191

You deserved it 9 764

By Anonymous - 03/09/2012 09:45 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 878

You deserved it 5 730

By Anonymous - 24/08/2014 05:51 - United States - Hicksville

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 941

You deserved it 7 033

By bad boyfriend - 26/03/2010 01:50 - Canada

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 509

You deserved it 25 311

DameGreyWulf 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 1:24

He was TRYING to talk to her... that's why he asked... I mean, yeah, you can go "YEAH HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT BABY" during sex, so I hear, but that doesn't mean it's not a question. And he WAS concerned with how she was feeling, obviously, or he wouldn't say "I was trying to make my girl ******" Bitch should have responded and told him what she liked. FYL OP [edit] god damn it FML... This was aimed at 1.

always_his 2

Wednesday 5 August 2009 1:22

I think that's FHL actually...

Comments

dvs01 0

Saturday 29 August 2009 2:46

Your life sucks because you didn't excite your girlfriend enough that one time? You give up too easily. Seriously man, how can you take this so seriously?

Mister_Kitty 0

Monday 31 August 2009 8:19

That's what you get for "trying" to give an ******.

Madoosa 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 2:40

Hey, as long as you're trying! Just remember, it is IMPORTANT to talk about what she likes and what more you can do to have her enjoy what you are doing because the more she is enjoying it, the more you will. Also, practice makes perfect. ;D

H4rdstylefre4k 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 23:04

You deserve it go back to sex-ed and give some more time for your girly

Daemonknight 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 10:19

ydi bro, learn to have sex, and practice practice practice... also learn how to eat pussy. I learned all I know from lesbians.

Daemonknight 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 10:28

i have no trouble satisfying women, they keep coming back to me for years. lesbians took my virginity, also having adequte girth and length doesn't hurt either. i have my Phd in satisfying the pu**y