Awkward, Drugs and Work: Woozy

Woozy

By Dunzo15 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves, so I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview, I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202 703

You deserved it 52 078

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Same thing different taste

By DontGive2Fox - 05/03/2019 04:00

Today, I had my first job interview and didn’t have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn’t speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 256

You deserved it 1 668

Dirty protest

By Paul - 21/08/2023 00:02

Today, I had a job interview; unfortunately for me, I was so nervous that all of a sudden I felt the need to take a huge dump. My bowels started growling out of protest. I tried to play it off as if it was due to me being hungry, but it sounded like I had a monster trapped in my guts. The interviewer raised an eyebrow in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 112

By Anonyme - 29/05/2012 10:19

Today, I went to my first ever job interview, in a totally stressed out state. The employer's first question was: "What's your name?" I forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 841

You deserved it 9 950

That went well

By not on life, that's for fucking sure - 25/10/2014 18:27 - United States

Today, I went to a big job interview. As I walked in, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Other highlights include my voice cracking multiple times, sweating profusely and getting uncontrollable nervous giggling. The interviewer eventually stared at me in disbelief and asked if I was high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 515

You deserved it 5 116

By Tiffer27 - 25/01/2016 18:02 - United States

Today, I went to a very important job interview. I was so nervous that I passed out right in front of the interviewer's desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 462

You deserved it 2 449

By RIP job - 28/09/2016 04:26 - Australia

Today, I had a job interview for an amazing opportunity. Too bad my nerves made me forget what the role was and where it was, mid-interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 219

You deserved it 1 547

By SenorPoopypants - 08/01/2017 19:23

Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 667

You deserved it 992

That escalated quickly

By lonelyharts86 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I had an interview for my dream job. I was offered coffee and a donut. It was going well until I took a bite of the donut and started choking on it. I coughed so hard I ended up vomiting into his garbage can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 256

You deserved it 3 898

By ugh - 21/01/2014 18:55 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I went to an important job interview. I was really anxious but tried to soldier on anyway. When I was called in, my nerves got so bad that I reverted to speaking my second language. Not first, second. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 451

You deserved it 6 029

Stress test

By anonymous - 20/10/2010 06:38 - New Zealand

Today, I got so nervous that I actually peed my pants during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 608

You deserved it 13 383

Fredzter 0

Saturday 2 May 2009 19:12

HAHAHA!!

FunWriter20 0

Saturday 2 May 2009 19:13

Lol, that is so funny! Wish I had that brownie now. Sucks for you, though. I hope it wasn't for a career, but just for a minimum wage job.

Comments

HelloNoora1 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 21:20

brownies take an hour to two to feel it

oscar10p32 0

Friday 10 June 2011 9:32

Stop Eaton shit tht ain't urs

asia3pea90 13

Tuesday 14 June 2011 2:25

You have to watch out for those weed brownies Dude xD m. They don't smell right?. Don't try them!. They don't taste right? Spit them outt!

xo_sweetheart_xo 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 5:23

hahaha this is awesome

sikkochikk 3

Wednesday 29 June 2011 23:15

Why is it always the brownies? Did u get the job?

puppysnout 1

Tuesday 2 August 2011 3:41

I wish I could have a stoner brownie...

mialee34 4

Sunday 7 August 2011 13:36

The stoners strike again!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHA!!!!

Lintu_26 23

Sunday 14 August 2011 0:22

Awesome :D just bad timing...^^

whitneymays3508 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 5:42

that's hilarious!

SummerFever 8

Tuesday 16 August 2011 7:30

Must've been made by the white boys with the dreadlocks

Keywords

AITA Awkward First Dates Love Dogs Animals Cute Alcohol Am I overreacting? Food Health Relatable Politics Thanksgiving Miscellaneous Family Holidays Transportation Cars Sex Intimacy Contraception Suspicious Cheating Poopoo peepee Kids Gross Accident Gifts Birthday

The Top

Today, I came home early from business trip to Paris, where I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of two years out and propose to her. I sneaked into our house as a surprise and… she was having sex with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 490

You deserved it 4 181

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 63

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 986

You deserved it 5 641

Today, I paid $140 extra to get more comfort during a flight. The man behind me was so tall that his legs didn't let me recline the seat, and complained every time I tried to during the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 230

Today, I had my first astounding orgasm during which I simultaneously shit myself and vomited. So thankful my new partner was present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 321

You deserved it 644

Today, I met my new neighbors. The first thing they did was build a fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 631

You deserved it 1 833

Today, I decided to modify my resume since I've handed out over 30 of them in the past couple of weeks and I haven't gotten any calls back. As soon as I opened it on word document, I noticed that I had forgotten to include my phone number for employers to contact me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 431

You deserved it 74 102

Today, after not going out in over a year, I finally agreed to go out with some friends. I had a lot of fun and was very happy, up until when I was on my way back home and I noticed my car's sunroof had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 205

You deserved it 1 450