You have been warned

By PUA - 15/03/2012 01:06 - United States

Spicy
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 332
You deserved it 6 601
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Top comments

Trembelwick 5

Ex-Marine used Slash on the wild enemy Boyfriend! It was super effective!

526 6

Comments

crushedone 7

Don't worry...your dick will be a much more difficult target.

29 0
iceman420son 7

Yea mine wouldent be the stump but the whole tree

1 14
KeyboardWarrior 10

That's pretty disgusting. Your dick isn't measured in inches, but ft.?

3 1
l0v3p4in 7

And this, OP, is what you will be doing to your daughters' boyfriends.

21 3
malbig776 1

Ex-marine is incorrect once a marine always a marine just saying u better be scared lol

62 5
dragonstrike94 8

They call cadavers ex marines

0 5
Grover217 0

Get it right. it's former marine, not ex

4 7
PInK_ExCiTeD 7

Yeah what 20 said marines are no joke!

6 1
TSN619 7

No jackass it's not former or ex Marine it's Marine get it right

1 2
SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10

Your a ******* asshole. These people die for our flag and freedom and you sit here and say this shit about them. Not many people are willing to take a gun and go to another country where everyone wants to kill them and take mortars and bullets for about 360,000,000 people's freedom. How about your think asshole before you go running your goddamn punkass mouth.

0 1
ultra_notorious 26

beat me to the punch, was thinking the same thing even though they belong to the USN!

0 0
Chavez45 2

There are no ex marines get it right. Maybe he should cut your dick off.

15 14
KrayKrayGurl117 7

Well you should never break a girls heart in the first place!!!

10 5
RabidBunny 10

Things like this make me feel glad to be single.

5 2
laden_swallow09 34

Yep! Being single doesn't suck… being alone, however, does. Stolen quote

0 0
beast_adh4 6

not being single sucks if their parents know but its worse when they talk shit behind your back

0 0
tmbfan 11

Whenever a girl's dad threatens me like that it just makes me wanna break up with her that way I preserve my dick.

5 23
Crazberry 5

Yes, nothing more important than that. Enjoy your lonely ass life sir.

7 8
tmbfan 11

Ever heard of mistakes? If you accidently mess up with a girl and she goes and tells her dad, her dad being the kind that threatens to chop your dick of there goes that for ya.

8 2
downtime 12

55, I fail to follow that backwards logic of yours. Avoid psycho father in law...=...forever alone? Uh...?

5 4
phatdaddy62 23

TMBfan, I think you're protecting your pussy!

3 2
ppatty 0

yea besides he doesn't know anything about girls he's only 14

2 0
bugmenotmofo 34

If PUA = pickup artist, then YDI for being a douche.

9 4
Aggro4u2c 0

There are no ex-Marines. Once a Marine, always a Marine.

18 4